Al Barry Quotes

If you want to be on top, you've got to have broad shoulders, because as fast as you get there, the faster they try to knock you down.

We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out how it travels inside wires.

What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another person, especially if he has had between four and seven beers.

There are a number of people without whom I could not have written this book, but I hope you don't hold that against them. They are all fine people, and they had no idea how it would turn out.

Everyone had a Japanese maple, although after Pearl Harbor most of these were patriotically poisoned, ringbarked and extirpated.

Keep your family and old friends around you. That's what I had done and that's what saved my life when it came to being famous.

There's only one drummer. We all travel to his beat. Well, I couldn't sing his song. Because for me, it wasn't a truthful statement. Well, Linda sang it, and it was a monster for her.

Friendship is tested in the thick years of success rather than in the thin years of struggle.

I want to do just, like, regular art. Whatever is made today on canvas goes up against all of art history. Its the most radical thing.

The Republicans have a high Beady-Eyed Self-Righteous Scary Borderline Loon Quotient, as evidenced by Phyllis Schlafly, Pat Robertson, the entire state of Utah, etc.

Skiers view snowboarders as a menace; snowboarders view skiers as Elmer Fudd.

The modern assault on the environment began about 50 years ago, during and immediately after World War II.

We are in an environmental crisis which threatens the survival of this nation, and of the world as a suitable place of human habitation.

Nevada has a very dynamic economy, with gambling being the number-one industry, followed closely by blood donorship.

I'd like to help educate kids about the Major Leagues - what to anticipate, what to expect, what they'll need to do to prepare themselves.

Der, die, das, dem, den, des. German's six ways of saying 'the', like six sexual positions you never knew existed. Hey, I just sprung a boner.

I want to try and do as much as I can as an actor. So far I think I've done pretty well with being a minister's son. And now I know I'm pretty darn good at playing a woman too.

The only time an Australian ever walks is when his car runs out of petrol.

My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.

Serra High school, to me, was my most enjoyable time for me in my entire life. That was the only time I was free. We just played baseball because it was fun.

All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.

Casting directors now just see me as the hard-core sniper or prison guard.

Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the 'most reliable Windows ever.' To me, this is like saying that asparagus is 'the most articulate vegetable ever.'

Move fast and break things.

The proof of Fermat's Last Theorem underscores how stable mathematics is through the centuries - how mathematics is one of humanity's long continuous conversations with itself.

Love is the state of enlightenment and enlightenment is the state of love. You can't make any separation between them. Enlightenment is the state of no feelings and pure knowledge and so is love.

I haven't really written my plays and books - I've heard them. The stories are there already, singing in your genes and in your blood.

Later, I even appeared in a Rock Opera with Richard Gere.

Mathematical objects are determined by - and understood by - the network of relationships they enjoy with all the other objects of their species.

I think it is going to be very difficult for any church that still calls itself a church, never to try and convince someone that their religion is the best one.

You think, you become that thought. And consciousness, or the state of pure awareness, is lost.

A full-grown manatee, which can weigh more than 1,000 pounds, looks like the result of a genetic experiment involving a walrus and the Goodyear Blimp.

I’m 59 and people call me middle aged. How many 118 year old men do you know?

I don't know what you guys say, but at home, life is way different from baseball.

Inspiration is not purely passive, but does favor the prepared mind.

I was born to hit a baseball. I can hit a baseball.

You must not believe anyone in the search for truth; you have to find out for yourself. But although you are on your own, help will come when it is really needed.

Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.

The Dutch look like a huge jar of marmalade.

In the words of a very famous dead person, 'A nation that does not know its history is doomed to do poorly on the Scholastic Aptitude Test.

I love the Olympics, because they enable people from all over the world to come together and--regardless of their political or cultural differences--accuse each other of cheating.

It is always worth itemising happiness, there is so much of the other thing in a life, you had better put down the markers for happiness while you can.

There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his head, he will hang up the phone immediately.

Sarcasm is the language of people whose emotions are dying.

By adopting the control strategy, the nation's environmental program has created a built-in antagonism between environmental quality and economic growth.

Earth Day 1970 was irrefutable evidence that the American people understood the environmental threat and wanted action to resolve it.

I do love to eavesdrop. It's inspirational, not only for subject matter but for actual dialogue, the way people talk.

If you want to fight a war on drugs, sit down at your own kitchen table and talk to your own children.

I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable.

For a Jewish guy, I've recorded a lot of Christmas albums.