Al Murray Quotes

When I'm training in December, I have to eat like 6,000 calories a day to maintain my weight. It's a bit tiring.

Coaches need to have a vision.

I play fantasy basketball and fantasy football, soccer.

Sometimes you're looking to play perfect tennis but it's not going to happen all the time and you have to accept it.

Abide in Jesus, the sinless One - which means, give up all of self and its life, and dwell in God's will and rest in His strength. This is what brings the power that does not commit sin.

Christ will always accept the faith that puts its trust in Him

If the spiritual life be healthy, under the full power of the Holy Spirit, praying without ceasing will be natural.

You are always talking about yourself and tennis and how you are feeling. I try to avoid it when I don't have to.

You can be careful as far as you can, but you never know when you're going to fall over and break your ankle. It's like when you drive a car, you don't think about crashing, do you?

The world asks, "What does a man own?"; Christ asks, "How does he use it?"

Learn to worship God as the God who does wonders, who wishes to prove in you that He can do something supernatural and divine.

Our happiness relies more on hope, faith and our inner values than on anything outside ourselves.

Just once how I'd like to see the headline say, not much to print today, can't find anything bad to say.

I don't really read the reviews, but I remember one a long time ago I read that said that I had a face like a potato.

It's hard to be an artist. It's hard to be anything. It's hard to be.

Every moment that you share someone else's pain, feel what they feel, makes you more human.

If you walk up to some random person on the street, grab them by the shoulder, and say 'Did you just see what I saw?!', you'll find that no-one wants to talk to you.

I know how to be sour. I know that taste.

Drinking again? Go to hell. All I ever do is make some movies that made a lot of money now leave me alone, I want to have some fun.

I'm just an obnoxious guy who can make it appear charming, that's what they pay me to do.

Totie Fields is one of my benchmarks for a lot of things. There was a standard of show business.

Something wild can happen to anybody and I caution anybody that walks out on the street, just settle your accounts before you leave the house every day.

Somewhere there's a score being kept, so you have an obligation to live life as well as you can, be as engaged as you can.

My back hurts. My legs ache. I'm only four!

The Army needs leaders the way a foot needs a big toe.

I try to be alert and available. I try to be available for life to happen to me.

To people who want to be rich and famous, I'd say, "Get rich first and see if that doesn't cover it."

The critics. When they're right, they're right for the wrong reasons. And they're usually wrong.

I met a woman who photographed celebrity dogs for a book, and she told me that Ralph Lauren's dog is named Rugby. I said, Yeah, but his real name is Stickball.

Zombies dont mess with other zombies.

The money thing is, the sort of Elvis Presley thing of buying you mother car is great, that's very good. My mother has learned how to spend money.

I think we're all sort of imprisoned by - or at least bound to - the choices we make... You want to say no at the right time and you want to say yes more sparingly.

I didn't get into this position by being like a stiff sitting on the set in a folding chair. I did it by walking around on the streets and stirring things up.

You cannot pray them out of hell.

The government can destroy wealth but it cannot create wealth, which is the product of labor and management working with creation.

I act like a jerk sometimes.

I've retired a couple of times. It's great, because you can just say, 'Oh, I'm sorry. I'm retired.'

I realize it's impossible to have any sympathy, I mean, true sympathy, for people that are famous.

Religion is the worst enemy of mankind. No single war in the history of humanity has killed as many people as religion has.

If I run into someone on the street, that's one thing. But answering mail for a living? I like a job where you can play and act kind of goofy and have some fun.

If you have a good script, that's what gets you involved. It's harder to write a good screenplay than to find something.

Golf was my first glimpse of comedy. I was a caddy when I was a kid. I was on the golf course rather than being in lessons, but I can play better now than I could then.

The only good thing about fame that I've gotten is I've gotten out of a couple of speeding tickets. I've gotten into a restaurant when I didn't have a suit and tie on. That's really about it.

You don't have to have all this film stock, you can work faster, and you don't need a giant crew. It's great.

It's much harder to play beloved than to play a rotten guy. Rotten guy is a piece of cake. So playing a beloved person really sets a high bar for your behavior and your acting and what you project.

If it starts to drag on set, or if you feel like it's not a fun experience, people get down, the energy gets down. You've got to keep the energy up.

The atheists traditionally hold their conventions from Good Friday to Easter Sunday during the hours Christ spent in the grave.

There are a lot of actors that are more talented than me at Second City who quit it before they even got to a paying status. Weird luck. I had no other option.

I don't know what my fans are going to think. It's definitely not what they're used to from me.

Just use the same quotes. It's the same story.