Al Yankovic Quotes

You don't need to be defined by your job.

As much as people are griping about the Internet taking sales away from artists, it's been a huge promotional tool for me.

I don't watch anything on a regular basis - I tend to binge-watch things.

I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue than spend one more minute with you.

Pop culture's gotten much more disposable.

Ever since the day you left me, I've been so miserable, my dear. I feel almost as bad as I did when you were still here.

If something is good enough, it can be out there and people will see it.

I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.

One of the hardest things I've had to deal with in my career is keeping my material topical even though I only release albums every three or four years.

I'm obviously not a rapper, and I don't have any claims to be one, really.

The music has always been my bread and butter, and I've focused more of my attention on that.

When I swore that you're getting more and more beautiful everyday. Well, I was only kidding, honey.

Got a brand new semi-automatic weapon with a laser sight. Oh, I'm praying that somebody tries to break in here tonight.

It becomes more important to me as time goes on to make every album the best thing I've ever done, so it's a lot of self-imposed pressure that also kind of slows me down a bit.

Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.

Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt.

You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill, now my scars are all healing, but my heart never will.

There's enough people that do unfunny music. I'll leave the serious stuff to Paris Hilton and Kevin Federline.

I love the way they run in fright when I turn on the kitchen light. And when I squish them on the ground, they make a pleasant crunchy sound.

You still have Top 40 radio now, but it's 40 different stations. There aren't many hits that everybody knows, and there aren't many real superstars.

There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can't think of a clever enough idea.

A lot of artists have really been supportive over the years.

I was abducted by some aliens from space who kind a looked like Jamie Farr.

I don't think there are any new media I'd like to cover.

By the time I'm in the studio recording my parody, 10,000 parodies of that song are on YouTube.

I do a lot of different things, sometimes at the same time, and it's very difficult to figure out where I fit.

I enjoy all kinds of music. But it is kind of strange when I do parodies, instead of setting up drums and guitar amps.

I'm very analytical, I'm very precise. I mean, I don't write for kids.

I like the guitar-driven music of Nirvana at its peak. At that point, I thought there was a lot of really exciting music coming out.

Right now I'm listening to a lot of Top 40 music, because THAT'S MY JOB.

I know now that everything I write, I'm going to put out, and I'll have to live with it for the rest of my life.

I like to think that I've gotten better at what I do. I spend more time and pay more attention to detail album after album. But pretty much it's stayed the same.

I have a long-standing history of respecting artists' wishes.

I do original songs in the style of other artists, where I try to learn all their musical idiosyncrasies and try to do something that sounds like them and yet is a bit more sick and twisted.

As a kid, I certainly never thought I would get to spend my life doing something fun.

A lot of my cartoon voices are basically just variations on my natural voice.

I've always enjoyed animation and voiceover work. That's something that I've been proactive about.

I decided that I wanted to be a voice on every animated cartoon in the history of the world - even shows that haven't been on the air for a very long time, that's going to be harder to pull off.

I think I'm equally as abusive as the editors normally are for the "Letters and Tomatoes" column, which is the fan mail part of MAD Magazine and an ongoing feature.

It's hard to say, I picked one of my favorite articles for the MAD vault. Which is one of the features of the Magazine so they don't have to actually pay artists or writers to come up with new stuff.

In a genre where most of the artists are one-hit wonders, I've been able to hang around longer than most "serious" acts. I pride myself in being a very talented leech.

Beans, beans, the magic legumes - the more you ingest, the more you consume.

A lot of rap songs don't usually have a lot of melody per se.

I'm known for being an up, high-energy, and optimistic kind of guy.

I don't watch a lot of other people's parodies because I don't want to be unduly influenced.

My personal taste doesn't enter into it a lot when I make my decisions as to what to parody.

So that's why one of my rules of parody writing is that it's gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit.

Buy our album, were Nirvana, a garage band from Seattle. Well, it sure beats raising cattle.

Boys like Peter are afraid of alot of things, like nuclear annihilation and flunking algebra, but they're not afraid of wolves.

You can play some schlock like New Kids On the Block.