Ambrose Quotes

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

CALLOUS, adj. Gifted with great fortitude to bear the evils afflicting another.

Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions.

Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.

Peace in international affairs: a period of cheating between periods of fighting

MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be.

TARIFF, n. A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer.

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.

I'm no politician. I'm an historian who has learned through a lifetime of studying that nothing in the world beats universal education.

To the eye of failure success is an accident.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.

Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.

Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors.

If you are at Rome live in the Roman style; if you are elsewhere live as they live elsewhere.

The flowers anew, returning seasons bring; but beauty faded has no second spring.

Just as riches are an impediment to virtue in the wicked, so in the good they are an aid of virtue.

The evolution theory is purely the product of the imagination.

The circus a place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.

Oh! How should all hearts be taken with this Christ? Why stand ye gazing on the toys of this world, when such a Christ is offered to you in the Gospel? Can the world die for you?

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

It would not be possible to praises nurses too highly.

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.

JEALOUS, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.

We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to call our attitude of subjection a posture of respect.

Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.

Washington's character was rock solid. He came to stand for the new nation and its republican virtues, which was why he became our first President by unanimous choice.

TAKE, v.t. To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.

The more sophisticated we get, the more advanced our buildings and vehicles become, the more vulnerable we are.

Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.

Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.

WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.

Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.

Think twice before you speak to a friend in need

FREEBOOTER, n. A conqueror in a small way of business, whose annexations lack of the sanctifying merit of magnitude.

Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.

I enjoy tasting [beer]. But I'm not a drinker, period. With my schedule, I don't really have time.

RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who utters them.

ENVY, n. Emulation adapted to the meanest capacity.

PREFERENCE, n. A sentiment, or frame of mind, induced by the erroneous belief that one thing is better than another.

BAIT, n. A preparation that renders the hook more palatable. The best kind is beauty.

Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.

Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.

REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.

RICH, adj. Holding in trust and subject to an accounting the property of the indolent, the incompetent, the unthrifty, the envious and the luckless.

Having my son, I mean, I feel already that it makes me a better actress. Just the feeling and the love that expands in my being is more than I ever thought possible.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.