Art Buchwald Quotes

I don't mind 800 million Chinese drinking a bottle [of Coca-Cola] a day, but I don't want them to bring back the empties.

I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.

No one ever mentioned it, but thousands of men welcomed World War II as a way to escape their humdrum lives rather than a chance to fight for God and country.

Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week

The most important thing about writing a book is having book parties.

Ascot is so exclusive that it is the only racecourse in the world where the horses own the people.

Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times it's the only time we've got.

I explained to him I had simple tastes and didn't want anything ostentatious no matter what it costs.

Whether it is the best of times or the worst of times, it is the only time we've got.

Whether it is the best of times or the worst of times, it is the only time we have.