Bill Cosby Quotes

It is not a matter of who is rejecting me, as much as it is somebody may get it, and I am going to keep plowing through it because in this world of education, there is a harvest.

A father has to do everything in his power to keep a tight ship, even though he knows the crew would like to send him away in a dinghy.

In Genesis, it is stated God walked on Earth. He was there on the level. After watching human behavior, he ascended having had enough of us and decided to watch over us instead.

A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.

And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl.

With my wife Camille's help, I took to social networking. I'm working with the computers.

When I was a child, I was living in the housing projects of Philadelphia. I didn't even have a Christmas tree.

If you have no faith, you've lost your battle.

I was'nt always black. there was this freckel that just grew and grew.

Zip zop wop boopity bop.

We're not raising children with the love that we need to.

Any husband who says, "My wife and I are completely equal partners," is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge.

Your parents put a curse on you - Someday your kids are going to act just like you.

Parenting needs to come to the forefront.

The wisest married men give in early. They get in touch with the wife side of themselves, and that's when they stop arguing.

All men should freely use those seven words which have the power to make any marriage run smoothly: You know dear, you may be right

You'll have many, many friends, but if your relationship with your mate is one hundred per cent of your heart, you'll never need a friend.

I don't think you can bring the races together by joking about the differences between them. I'd rather talk about the similarities, about what's universal in their experiences.

And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl...there's a little voice that say, 'I wonder where he would go...'...if it hadn't been for his head.

If you took your child to the dentist and check for cavities, the child likely won't get them. If you take them just for emergency, that's all they're gonna get.

Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of us.

Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His kids.

Today's parents grew up with the silly notion that music was meant to be heard.

'Don't worry about senility', my grandfather used to say.

Grandparents are God's gifts to children.

There should be marches in every neighborhood every day telling the people about the negativity of drugs and how the drugs help us to behave negatively.

But if that's what you want to be, that's what you will be - as long as you study.

If the audience knows you can be funny when you want to be, they will be willing to wait for that payoff.

Fatherhood is asking your son to make up a name rather than tell anybody who he is.

We’ve got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch.

I'm going out... because I deserve to go out! And I'm going to get drunk... because I deserve to get drunk! And get out of my way!

My wife was a beautiful woman before we had children.

A child who is disciplined will be more obedient and also more organized as a student.

The summit, which is set up to educate people about managing their money and protecting their income, leads to empowerment of self, for which this summit needs to be applauded.

In America ... the seven ages of man have become preschooler, Pepsi generation, baby boomer, mid-lifer, empty-nester, senior citizen, and organ donor.

I did not want to turn to playing golf because golf is about as much exercise as shuffling cards.

Anyone who has brought up children knows that consistency has absolutely nothing to do with discipline.

I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!

All Children Have Brain Damage!

I wanted to give the house back to the parents.

A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.

I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid.

If you're a parent, the five worst words you can say to your children are, "When I was your age ..." You were never their age. You were older in the womb.

In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to most fathers and...mothers Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.

People should fact check. People shouldn’t have to go through that and shouldn’t answer to innuendos.

I don't wear no condom and I don't plan for no kids.

And to those people with no children but who think they'd like to have them some day to fulfill their lives. Remember: With fulfillment comes responsibility.

Have you ever had a cookie? Then you won't get any here either.

How long can you tread water?

What best defines a child is the total inability to receive information from anything not plugged in.