Brian Spellman, Cartoonist's Book Camp Quotes

My life is so bad that it's worse than it really is.

I can't name just one example. Then there's only one.

Mom lied. The crust is the shittiest part.

I finally decided what I want to be when I grow up - late.

My secret to maintaining a youthful appearance? Immaturity.

I was accused of always acting superior. Always means being, not acting.

I recovered from recovering so no longer celebrate not doing bad things to defend myself as good. I added new bad for good measure.

Don't stay in this now. You'll fall behind.

First, let me finish. Then interrupt.

Peace ain't worth fighting for.

The first casualty of war is casual wear.

Okay, you won our shitty little argument. Pass the world.

If the mind fits, shrink it.

I can't prove it yet know it when I seem it.

I love objectivity when mine.

An apple a day feeds the tapeworm to stay.

I forgot what I was going to think.

I've been coerced into free will.

I learned to smile, avoiding happiness advice.

Ultimate meaning is meaningless. Meaning meaning means everything else.

There is a meaning of life but I've been sworn to secrecy.

If you only go around once in life, then why has that one gone around more than once?

Life is short unless agony is long.

I hate feeling hate but feeling nothing feels worse.