Caitlin Moran Quotes

If anyone was going to write a song or, you know, or a book, or make a film about a girl like me, it was going to have to be a girl like me, and quite literally, me.

Let's all go and be feminists in the pub.

Benedict Cumberbatch is very beautiful.

If you can find a frock you look nice in and can run up three flights of stairs, you're not fat.

If you read all your history books, there are no women in them.

As far as I'm concerned, you're a feminist by default if you're born in the Western world right now.

In the end I want to spend my 60s writing bonkbusters like Jilly Cooper.

Feminism, as it stands, well... stands. It has ground to a halt.

Women are feminist by default.

I am not good at small talk. I will hide in a cupboard to avoid chitty-chat.

I am pathetically law-abiding.

I can't think of anything I hate more than a former punk - they are the most self-righteous people in the world.

I think it's a really important thing for women to be able to just put their hands up and go, I can't actually do any more.

I do not... look very feminine. Diana, Princess of Wales is feminine... I am... femi-none.

I just want Tina Fey to be my best friend. And Lena Dunham. And Oprah, too.

Just proportionately, statistically, one in three women are going to have an abortion. They're not all going to feel guilty.

Nowadays, to be frank, every week is a good week for freakshow television. we might start asking, Why are there so many freaks? And why do they all want to be on television?

As a former ballerina, I can't put down Maggie Shipstead's new book, Astonish Me.

I am fully aware of what the word 'fat' means ... It's a swear word. It's a weapon. It's a sociological subspecies. It's an accusation, dismissal, and rejection.

Mental health is seen as a massive drag to have to write about - worthy, dull. Something you should 'have' to read / write about.

You should write, write, write every day, and learn to edit and pare it right back so you're proud of every sentence, and each one is either being useful or beautiful, but hopefully both.

I wrote my first book at eight, all of four pages. At 10, I did a 40-page story. At 12, I wrote two stage plays.

You think it doesn't really matter if you screw up this time around because you can just sort it all out in paradise

It's just a horrible thing to keep saying to a woman, do you want a baby inside you? I mean, it's creepy.

All art is someone trying to tell you something.

I think that instead of feminism being a political thing, it should be an act of creativity. It's more of a rock n' roll thing.

I wish I could learn that just three drinks is enough, but I have not learned that.

All the things that are taboo are the things that are not normal, and all the things that are not normal are the things that are exclusively about physically being a woman.

I wish I could give up smoking, but it does taste so delicious.

I've got more friends than I've ever had in my life at the age of 39 - although given that I didn't have any friends until the age of 27, it doesn't say much - because I found the internet.

You stop talking about things when you’ve worked them out. You’re no longer an observer but a participant. You’re too busy for this bullshit.

And the question is always "When are you going to have kids?" Rather than "Do you want to have kids?

... motherhood is a game you must enter with as much energy, willingness, and happiness as possible.

It makes you love vividly, work intensely, and realize that, in the scheme of things, you really don't have time to sit on the sofa in your undies watching Homes Under the Hammer.

The aphorism "If you want something done, ask a busy woman" is in direct acknowledgment of the efficiency boot camp parenthood puts you through.

Parents drinking is the reason you came into the world, and if we didn't keep doing it then, by God, it would be the reason you went back out of it.

Batman doesn’t want a baby in order to feel he’s ‘done everything’. He’s just saved Gotham again! If this means that Batman must be a feminist role model above, say, Nicola Horlick, then so be it.

Your key hobbies need to be long country walks (get some fresh air in those lungs!), masturbation, and the revolution. Between those three, you should, in the long term, stay relatively sane.

David Cameron is a C-3P0 made of ham.

When a woman walks into a room, her outfit is the first thing she says, before she even opens her mouth. Women are judged on what they wear in a way men would find incomprehensible.

The reason they don't ask me when they're having kids, of course, is because men can, pretty much, carry on a normal life once they've had a baby.

Strip clubs let everyone down. Men and women approach their very worst here.

We're supposed to speak from the heart in what we wear. We have to find capsule wardrobes.

Women wear heels because they think they make their legs look thinner.

Not one had ever passed judgement on my cheap handbag to my face. But then, this is a reserved country.

The actual handbag is neither here nor there-- it's what you keep in it that's the most important thing.

Amnesty International Survey found that 25 percent of people believe a woman is to blame for being raped if she dresses "provocatively.

For a woman, every outfit is a hopeful spell, cast to influence the outcome of the day. An act of trying to predict your fate, like looking at your horoscope.

Life is really the only place you can learn the most important lessons about how to get dressed and to be happy.

Women are always being asked when they're going to have children. It's a question they're asking even more often.