Charles M. Schulz Quotes

The worst part of it is you don't know if he's barking at an owl, the moon or a burglar!" "That's one of the drawbacks of a limited vocabulary!

Why is it that you don't love me?" "Sometimes I wish I knew..." "Don't anybody tell him!!

No problem is too big to run away from.

Don't be a leaf... Be a tree!

If you grit your teeth and show real determination, you'll always have a chance.

You know what Oscar Wilde said, ma'am? He said, "nothing that is worth knowing can be taught". Nothing personal, ma'am... Carry on.

I love people; it's mankind I can't stand.

Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker.

The world is filled with unmarried marriage counselors.

Well, I know about loneliness. I won't talk about it, but I was very lonely after the war. I know what it feels like to spend a whole weekend all by yourself and no one wants you at all.

Happiness is waking up, looking at the clock and finding that you still have two hours left to sleep.

Snoopy (musing on his rooftop): Good Grief! Is it November already? My life is going by too fast. I think someone pushed the "Fast Forward" button.

Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about...That always worries me!

It doesn't matter what you believe just so long as you're sincere.

There sure are a lot of these 'instant' products on the market. Instant coffee, instant tea, instant pudding, instant cereal... instant dislike.

I proved to you that psychiatry is an exact science!" "An exact science?!" "Yes, you owe me exactly one hundred and forty-three dollars!

This is my report on how to live... They say the best way is just to live one day at a time... If you try to live seven days at a time, the week will be over before you know it.

There's nothing like unrequited love to take all the flavor out of a peanut butter sandwich.

Winning isn't everything, but losing isn't anything.

What if everyone in the whole world suddenly decided to run away from his problems?" "Well, at least we'd all be running in the same direction!

Never lie in bed at night asking yourself questions you can't answer.

One moment, please... We interrupt our regular program to bring you this special bulletin: It's a nice day outside.

Goodbys always make my throat hurt... I need more hellos.

A cartoonist is someone who has to draw the same thing day after day without repeating himself.

There is no greater burden than great potential.

Only in math can you buy sixty cantaloupes and no one asks what the hell is wrong with you.

That's the only dog I know who can smell someone just thinking about food.

No problem is so formidable that you can't walk away from it.

I have observed that whenever you try to hit somebody, there is a tendency for them to try to hit you back.

Sucking your thumb without a blanket is like eating a cone without ice cream!

Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

Security is a thumb and a blanket. Happiness is a warm puppy.

There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.

There's no sense in doing a lot of barking if you don't really have anything to say.

Wouldn't it be nice if our lives were like VCRs , and we could 'fast forward' through the crummy times?

I have deep feelings of depression... What can I do about this?' 'Snap out of it! Five cents, please.

I have a feeling that when my ship comes in I'll be at the airport.

I love humanity, it's people I don't like.

For a nothing, Charlie Brown, you're really something!

Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Linus, Lucy. How can I ever forget them.

The term that best describes me now is 'secular humanist.'

I think we can rule out 'mixed brain dominance' as a cause of your poor performance at school, Charlie Brown" "Have you ruled out stupidity?" "Peanuts", Charles M

I can hear my heart beating. I can hear my stomach growling. I can hear my teeth grinding and my joints creaking. My body's so noisy, I can't sleep.

Empty?! You took all the cookies!" "They were crying to get out of the jar... Cookies get claustrophobia too, you know!

A good education is the next best thing to a pushy mother.

A tragic life is romantic when it happens to somebody else.

I love America. It's Americans I can't stand.

I'm dying and all I hear are insults!

Decorate your home. It gives the illusion that your life is more interesting than it really is.

I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.