Christopher Moore Quotes
Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers? Mrs. Ling: Could be . . . . You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong? Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.
Routine feeds the illusion of safety...
Mr. Asher, you can resist who you are for only so long. Finally, you just decide to go with fate.
Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him....
I like a girl with a substantial bottom, ' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
What love is not torment when a man knows not how to love himself? Talk not of drowning, but attaining your heart's desire by action: Put money in thy purse.
So I am death" Charlie said then turned to his daughter while buttering his toast."This is death toast sweety.
Andrew Lloyd Webber's version of the Kool-Aid jingle is at once chilling and evocative. Donny Osmond is brilliant as James Jones.
You cannot believe what you do not believe, Rumi siad. I am an Untouchable because my karma dictates it.
But Charlie could imagine, because he was a Beta Male, and imagination was his curse....
Blessed with the Beta Male imagination, he spent much of his life squinting into the future so he might spot ways in which the world was conspiring to kill him...
We were seekers. You are that which is sought, Joshua. You are the source. The end is divinity, in the beginning is the word. You are the word.
The three jewels of Tao: compassion, moderation, and humility. Balthasar said compassion leads to courage, moderation leads to generosity, and humility leads to leadership.
Apologies, one loses perspective after spending a week in a brothel.
Scratch a cynic and you will find a disappointed romantic.
A question asked in earnest, deserves an earnest answer.
It was the sound of a thousand hungry children crying, ten thousand widows tearing their hair over their husband's graves, a chorus of angels singing the last dirge on the day of God's death.
You're trying to be tricky. What's morality?""It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize.""Must be a human thing.""Exactly.
But she's a redhead, so she's probably evil, even at her tender age.""I thought you liked redheads.""I do. What's your point?
Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily."No.""Elvis?""I told you, it's supernatural.
Lucien, women are wondrous, mysterious, and magical creatures, who should be treated not only with respect but with reverence, perhaps even awe. Now go sweep the steps.
On the radio, turned low, Reba sang of hard times with the full authority of a cross-eyed redheaded millionaire.
When I teach seminars, I tell people, 'Your stuff has to look like something that's out there, because otherwise nobody will take a chance on you.'