Derek Landy Quotes

We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant

Doors are for people with no imagination.

I love you all, even those I don’t particularly like. That’s you, Beryl.

I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.

Kindness suits you." "Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.

The Baron, unfortunately, turns it all the way up to eleven." "Seriously? Because, you know, that's one more evil

Well, for future reference, this is my serious face.

Plans are invitation to disappointment.

I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly littering.

Are you sulking?” “Me? No. I don’t sulk.” “You sound like you’re sulking.” “I’m just waiting for the violent urges to subside.

Every solution to every problem is simple. It's the distance between the two where the mystery lies.

Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.' And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.

The sparrow flies south for the winter.

"Found something?"..."No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more floor."

Tides do what tides do – they turn.

I would love to have a battle of wits with you, Bison, but I doubt it would be a fair fight.' 'Shut your face.' 'Exactly my point.

The world is bigger than you know, and scarier than you might imagine. The only currency worth anything is being true to yourself, and the only goal worth seeking is finding out who you truly are.

I kill a sofa for you and you go and sit in a chair?” Skulduggery asked. “I don’t think you appreciate the sacrifice that has been made for you.

Embrace your inner lunatic.

I could've died because you had to tie your shoelace?

Right, well, we've got to work out what we need. We've got to work out what we need, how we get it, and what we need to get to get what we need.

You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.

A living skeleton isn't enough for you, is it? What does it take to impress young people these days?

It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows -

The calm before the storm

Are you kidding? I jumped off a building -- of course I'm hurt.

Valkyrie, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your friend is most likely dead.” “Of course he’s dead. He’s a skeleton.

I am a rational man, but haven't you heard? i'm also insane. It gives me a unique perspective on things.

Valkyrie: “You are such a moron.” Skulduggery: “Don't be jealous of my genius.

So he has no head' 'Thats usually what headless means' 'No head at all?' 'Your really not getting the whole headless thing are you?' 'Its just kind of silly even for us.

They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.

But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake.

Come and have a go, if you think you're hard enough

You say one more thing that sounds like it's ripped from the pages of a really bad gothic romance and I'm out of here, are we clear?" - Valkyrie Cain

Sometimes it's not what you say, Valkyrie, it's just the fact that you're saying it.

That was a good day for me," Skulduggery said. "I didn't have to hit anyone. I didn't have to shoot anyone. I just sat around and talked to my good friend and partner, Valkyrie Cain.

Are you taking my hat hostage?

You can only anticipate what someone is going to do if you know exactly what that someone has just done.' --Skulduggery

Sanguine felt the ridiculous urge to reach out and poke him, just to see if he’d react, but he’d seen that kind of anger before. It was the quiet kind. The dangerous kind.

You've been reading Gordan's book again, haven't you?" "It's a white-knuckle roller-coaster ride," she mumbled.

We punch people, Valkyrie. That’s who we are. Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.

What?" she asked again. He pointed ahead of them. "See that?" "What, the snow?" "Beyond that." "More snow?" "Stop looking at the snow.

You are a cynical man, Mr. Pleasant." "We live in cynical times, Miss Cain.

She wants to be polite and not hurt your feelings, so she's not going to laugh right now. But inside, inside she's laughing.

Just because an apple falls one hundred times out of a hundred does not mean it will fall on the hundred and first.

Suddenly Saracen Rue looked old and tired, and Skulduggery Pleasant came into focus as what he really was – a genius, a killer, a tortured soul, and the only true dead man among them.

Don't be jealous of my genius.

Stephanie had no problem doing what she was told, just so long as she was given a good reason why she should.

You need to find yourself a new hero." - Skulduggery Pleasant.

Then I reckon we got ourselves a good old-fashioned standoff." ... Nobody moved, or said anything, for the next few moments. "Old-fashioned standoffs are mighty borin