Derek Landy Quotes

I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall.

When I meet people, I no longer say "Hi, I'm Derek Landy, pleased to meet you." Now I say "Hi, I'm number one bestselling author Derek Landy. Worship me.

He stepped closer to her. "Thank you for saving me," he said softly, and wrapped the bones of his arms around her. Valkyrie smiled and hugged him back.

You're under arrest for multiple counts of murder. You have the right to not much at all, really. Do you have anything to say in your defense?

If anyone stops us, as long as we mumble something pretentious about the glory of death, we should be fine.

Fletcher was always going to be your ex-boyfriend, from the moment you met him. He's just finally caught up with where he's supposed to be.

What would killing the Elders result in?" "Panic? Fear? Three empty parking spaces in the Sanctuary?

China is the same age as I am, and even I have to admit that she wears it better!" He laughed, then stopped and peered at her. "Because I'm a skeleton" he explained.

She had been a teenager once, and she knew that, despite the apparent contradictions, a person's teenage years lasted well into their fifties.

I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.

The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.

Love is finding someone better than you are, and holding on for dear life

Do you think it would be quite so easy to kill them now that your weapon has been destroyed?' he sneered. 'No,' she said, frowning at him, 'Obviously not.

Oh, escape is easy once you have the right plan.' 'Do we have the right plan?' 'Not yet.' 'Do we have any plan?' 'Not yet.

Cheer up everyone," he said, a new brightness to his voice. "Since we’re all going to die horribly anyway, what’s there to be worried about?

Because I’m an English ninja,” Tanith replied. “We’re just like regular ninjas, except we wear leather and flirt more.

We don’t do what we do for the glory or the fame or the credit; we do it for the quiet satisfaction of making the world a better place, saving the lives of innocents, and being better than you are.

Scapegrace leaped up. “I am the Killer Supreme! I make murder into an art form!” Skulduggery hit him again and Scapegrace did a little twirl before falling.

We may need to focus here.' 'Right. Yes. OK. Turn around.' 'Are you going to throw something at me?' 'What? No, I'm getting out of bed.

That's a shame. I'm sure somebody, somewhere, cares.

And then the Necromancers pulled out their sub-atomic machine guns.

Life isn't fair,' Skulduggery said. 'In my experience, death isn't so different.

By the way, all joking aside, do I call you Ghastly or Elder Bespoke?' 'You can call me whatever you like.' Vex nodded. 'Thank you, Gladys.

Oh my god you're thicker than you look

People!" she screamed. "There are people here! New people!

Of course I want to kill you," said Skulduggery. "I want to kill most people. But then where would I be? In a field of dead people with no one to talk to.

Very' is such a strong word.

It always surprised Valkyrie whenever she realized just how close the weird and the wonderful, and the fierce and the frightening, lived to the rest pf the non-magical, mortal world.

We didn't die,' she said. Of course not. I'm too clever to die, and you're too pretty.' I am pretty,' Valkryie said, managing a grin.

While my insides may be rotten, I still like a good reason to kill someone. It has to be either business, personal, or out of sheer boredom.

You said I was your number-one pick." "And you are. In our hearts. Alphabetically, though, Dusk comes before you.

Personally, I think knees should be kept for the eighth or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice surprise you know? 'oh, my darling, you have knees! I never would have thought

"Please forgive me," Pleasant said, then aimed the gun at the girl and pulled the trigger.

Well, to put it delicately, she has the power to suck out people's brains.

You have an amazing ability to depress me sometimes, you know that?" "I try my best.

They might be kittens," she said hopefully. "They're stalking us." "They might be shy." "I don't think it's kittens, Valkyrie." "Puppies, then?

This girl (Stephanie) is but a few months away from her seventeenth birthday and already she has saved the world and killed a god. What have you done?

Here she is,” her mum said, cooing at the baby, “my special girl.” “Oh, cheers,” Valkyrie said, rolling her eyes.

I love stories with a happy ending,” Inspector Me said.

I used to be so good at that kind of thing," Skulduggery said quietly. "Well, my morale is certainly boosted," Valkyrie informed him. "Really?" "god no. That was terrible

skulduggery pleasant is the best book I've ever read and has enspired myself to become an author.

Desmond, don't poke the baby!'... 'I'll get you next time-' Don't threaten the baby either!'.

He looked at her. “We’re meant to be together…” “And this is exactly what I mean.” “Our love is written in the stars.” “And there you go again.” “I love you.” “You bore me.

It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like.

Tanith has a sword.' said Valkyrie. 'I want a stick.' 'I'll get you a stick for Christmas

Guild doesn't like me." "That's true." "He doesn't like you, ether." "That is mystifying.

She glared at him. 'I'm not weird like that. I'm good weird. I'm cool weird.' 'Yes,' he said doubtfully. 'Yes, you are.

Her father sagged as relief spread through him. “I thought something awful was happening.” She frowned. “Something awful was happening. It could have got stuck in my hair.

He crouched at the car window and looked in. 'What a lovely family you have. What a charming family. They're all lovely. Except for that one.' His finger jabbed the glass. 'That one's a bit ugly.

Oh, China. How I have missed you.' 'And I have missed you, Eliza. But don't worry, next time my aim will be better.