Ed Martin Quotes

Politicians were mostly people who'd had too little morals and ethics to stay lawyers.

I was probably cool around the end of 2002.

Amongst the qualities a hero should have, I would include determination, loyalty, courage, perseverance, patience, focus, intrepidity and selflessness.

There is no sadder tale in the annals of architecture than the virtual disappearance of the defining architectural form of the Modern Movement - publicly sponsored housing.

But every historical statement and legitimization itself moves within a certain relation to history.

I wanted to trust in my partners and the directors and producers and do the best I can to deliver what I could deliver.

I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming.

I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.

You don't want your children to look at you like you are anything special other than their dad.

Ask forgiveness, not permission. But make sure you bring your results with you.

Maybe one thing is that you have to find the best way to write whatever works better for you.

Cats definitely have their own opinions.

I think the complaint that I hear most often from kids, even kids who like to write is that don't know what to write about. A journal is a great source of story starters.

Every time I finish a book, it's my favorite. I have a lot of favorites. I did just finish Jane Eyre and it was fabulous. I didn't want it to end.

I didn't really have a major role in how it was described. I wanted it to be a collection of essays where each storyline could be contained.

I think funniness is a sign of intelligence.

Those who are dead are not dead They're just living in my head.

Examples of selling of ideas are portrayed in consulting or paid advice, as the pricing of intellectual property is market driven.

We know of fishing vessels that carry up to twelve different flags on board, and they re-flag their ship at sea,.

They should call fishing what it really is... tricking and killing!

I think one of the most groundbreaking inventions of all time is the jackhammer.

Overheard today in restaurant: Can you stop listening to our conversation?

I can always tell how stupid someone is by how certain they are about what they're saying.

Yes" actually means "No" 100% of the time, when the question is "Can I give you some advice?

I have a time machine at home. It only goes forward at regular speed

Drunken behavior will not be tolerated, except by those who are being hilarious.

Nothing wise was ever printed upon an apron.

When watering your plants, try to talk to them - say something like, Hold it right there and then shoot them with water gun.

Our Times, a Brief History: As televisions became flatter, People became rounder.

Easy way to make someone sound less powerful, just put DJ in front of their name... ..DJ Abraham Lincoln

I would like to have windshield wipers that do the whole windshield, please.

One time I saw an old man in a hurry and I thought, 'That makes sense.'

Count your blessings, but not out-loud, at the top of your lungs.

I am a man. And I am former baby and a future skeleton, and I am a distant future pile of dust.

I went whale watching once. It was very similar to watching people on a boat become disappointed.

I have fun acting, and I want to do more of it, and I want to direct my own movie.

If someone throws a pie at your face, just open your mouth really wide and say, 'Thanks for feeding me, a**hole.'

Whenever I investigate a smell, I find that the answer is always bad. It's never: 'What is that? *sniff* muffins!'

A mobile home with a flat tire is a home.

Clowns have no respect for pie.

If I had to pick one artist to tile my bathroom I would go with MC Escher.

There are very few songs about just liking someone as a friend.

It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.

You can say 'Thanks,' and you can say 'Thanks a Million' - but any number in between?

I still like paper books. Like, book is a flammable object. After you read it, you could use it to get warm. Or it could become a pile of napkins.

You get really disillusioned, because you thought you were in love. But you realize that you're just alone.

I wasn't the class clown, but I was starting to become the "crazy guy" at law school, which is the guy who is not so much "crazy" as "annoying."

Every fight is a food fight when youre a cannibal.

They say it's lonely at the top. It must be even lonelier at the tippy top.

It's not enough to say I'm sorry. You have to also mean it. It's the same with saying I'm single.