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Elayne Boosler Quotes

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Elayne Boosler Quotes: "We've seen the uproars around the world concerning cartoons depicting the prophet Mohammad. Anyone who does not think comic strips are relevant never had a fatwa put on him/her for drawing a picture."

We've seen the uproars around the world concerning cartoons depicting the prophet Mohammad. Anyone who does not think comic strips are relevant never had a fatwa put on him/her for drawing a picture.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I can tell by your eye shadow, you're from Brooklyn, right? . . . Me too. My mother has plastic covers on all the furniture. Even the poodle. Looked like a barking hassock walking down the street."

I can tell by your eye shadow, you're from Brooklyn, right? . . . Me too. My mother has plastic covers on all the furniture. Even the poodle. Looked like a barking hassock walking down the street.




Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I have always put my own money into Tails of Joy. For years, every time a dog walked by, my husband would say, 'There goes our beach house.'"

I have always put my own money into Tails of Joy. For years, every time a dog walked by, my husband would say, 'There goes our beach house.'



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Wouldn’t it be great to see a line in all movie credits that truthfully says, “Nobody was harmed in the making of this film, and at the cast party, all animals got a belly belly belly rub”."

Wouldn’t it be great to see a line in all movie credits that truthfully says, “Nobody was harmed in the making of this film, and at the cast party, all animals got a belly belly belly rub”.




Elayne Boosler Quotes: "The thing about breaking up when you get older, you just don't have the steam anymore. "Oh, that's it. I can't start shaving my legs above the knee again.""

The thing about breaking up when you get older, you just don't have the steam anymore. "Oh, that's it. I can't start shaving my legs above the knee again."



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club."

I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I don't categorize myself. I don't think I'm perceived as a female act by my audience. My fans include just as many men as women."

I don't categorize myself. I don't think I'm perceived as a female act by my audience. My fans include just as many men as women.




Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I just get the feeling that if Jesse Helms was in charge of art in America, you'd go into a museum and see nothing but prints of dogs playing cards."

I just get the feeling that if Jesse Helms was in charge of art in America, you'd go into a museum and see nothing but prints of dogs playing cards.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Turkeys know their names, come when you call, and are totally affectionate. They're better than teenagers."

Turkeys know their names, come when you call, and are totally affectionate. They're better than teenagers.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Incredibly, almost every hotel I ever played in Vegas was blown up shortly afterward: The Dunes, The Sands, The Landmark, The Aladdin, The Frontier, The Hacienda, The Stardust - all were imploded."

Incredibly, almost every hotel I ever played in Vegas was blown up shortly afterward: The Dunes, The Sands, The Landmark, The Aladdin, The Frontier, The Hacienda, The Stardust - all were imploded.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Horse racing is waning in popularity."

Horse racing is waning in popularity.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I always had a running commentary in my head that was extremely funny and off-center, but I never said it to anyone."

I always had a running commentary in my head that was extremely funny and off-center, but I never said it to anyone.




Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Every time we help an animal, we are healing ourselves, over and over."

Every time we help an animal, we are healing ourselves, over and over.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "As for being a voice in politics, I feel whether you are famous or not, busy or not, it's incumbent upon every citizen to participate in this government in any way we can."

As for being a voice in politics, I feel whether you are famous or not, busy or not, it's incumbent upon every citizen to participate in this government in any way we can.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I've never been able to write for stand-up."

I've never been able to write for stand-up.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "San Francisco is really fun and liberal, and it's my kind of politics. It's like being Jewish in front of Jewish people."

San Francisco is really fun and liberal, and it's my kind of politics. It's like being Jewish in front of Jewish people.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Here is what is needed for Occupy Wall Street to become a force for change: a clear, and clearly expressed, objective. Or two."

Here is what is needed for Occupy Wall Street to become a force for change: a clear, and clearly expressed, objective. Or two.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Calgary wins for my coldest New Year's Eve gig. That's when I learned Fahrenheit and Celsius cross at 40 below. I could see callers' breath coming out of my phone."

Calgary wins for my coldest New Year's Eve gig. That's when I learned Fahrenheit and Celsius cross at 40 below. I could see callers' breath coming out of my phone.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I love being down at Occupy Wall Street. The sincerity, the youth involvement, the desire for better, is palpable and moving. There is true caring, sharing, and refreshingly naïve hope."

I love being down at Occupy Wall Street. The sincerity, the youth involvement, the desire for better, is palpable and moving. There is true caring, sharing, and refreshingly naïve hope.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I can't get married. I can't fake sleep for 30 years."

I can't get married. I can't fake sleep for 30 years.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about."

I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "There are many comedians who are afraid to work outside the coasts and the casinos because they're afraid they'll bomb."

There are many comedians who are afraid to work outside the coasts and the casinos because they're afraid they'll bomb.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "I think about death. I don't want to die with clothes in the cleaners."

I think about death. I don't want to die with clothes in the cleaners.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "President Reagan is a lot like E.T. He's cute, he's lovable, and he knows nothing about how Americans live."

President Reagan is a lot like E.T. He's cute, he's lovable, and he knows nothing about how Americans live.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower."

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times men would not stop to ask directions."

My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times men would not stop to ask directions.



Elayne Boosler Quotes: "For a single woman preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton."

For a single woman preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.