Frank Zappa Quotes

Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.

To me absurdity is the only reality

It isn't necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice. There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.

The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they're property.

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents — because they have a tame child-creature in their house.

I think that if a person doesn't feel cynical then they're out of phase with the 20th century. Being cynical is the only way to deal with modern civilization - you can't just swallow it whole.

Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?

Don't eat the yellow snow.

You've got to be digging it while it's happening 'cause it just might be a one shot deal.

We pretend to be a free society, and we pretend to be an adult society, but if you look at the facts, our news is just as contrived, and controlled as Pravda!

Music, in performance, is a type of sculpture. The air in the performance is sculpted into something.

I searched for years I found no love. I'm sure that love will never be a product of plasticity.

Most rock journalism is people who can't write, interviewing people who can't talk, for people who can't read.

I knew Jimi (Hendrix) and I think that the best thing you could say about Jimi was: there was a person who shouldn't use drugs.

Science is moving closer to weaponry, and Art is moving closer to commercialism. And never the twain shall meet.

The disgusting stink of a too-loud electric guitar; now that's my idea of a good time.

There is no hell. There is only France.

Drugs will turn you into your parents.

There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.

The whole Universe is a large joke. Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke. So why take anything too serious.

Don't forget to vote.

Nobody looks good bent over. Especially to pick up a check.

Tighten my headband for an extra rush.

If you pick up a guitar and it says, 'take me, I'm yours,' then that's the one for you

Ram it up your poop chute.

Two things are universal: Hydrogen and stupidity

Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.

Modern music is people who can't think signing artists who can't write songs to make records for people who can't hear.

This here song might offend some, if it does it's because your dumb.

Left me here to cry alone with a bottle of juice and pork chop bone.

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer.

who are the brain police?

The closer you are, the brighter the flames in my heart.

If we can't be free at least we can be cheap.

Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.

Let's not be too tough on our own ignorance. It's the thing that makes America great. If America weren't incomparably ignorant, how could we have tolerated the last eight years?

Sometimes you got to get sick before you can feel better.

Your mind is totally controlled, it has been stuffed into my mold. And you will do as you are told, until the rights to you are sold.

No change in musical style will survive unless it is accompanied by a change in clothing style. Rock is to dress up to.

Elmore James only knew one lick, but you had the feeling that he meant it.

Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something, uses that something to support their own existence.

You can bet everything will come to an end. It's going to be ugly and it's going to be a mess, and it's going to be something that somebody did in the name of God.

A true Zen saying: "Nothing is what I want.

Bad facts make bad law, and people who write bad laws are in my opinion more dangerous than songwriters who celebrate sexuality.

Don't go to bed with any woman crazier than you are.

If classical music is the state of the art, then the arts are in a sad state.

We could improve worldwide mental health if we acknowledged that parents can make you crazy.

I enjoy irritating the people who enjoy being irritated.

I think the music of the Fifties is really good. I suspect it's much better musically than much of what's available now. Not in terms of production, but in terms of content.

Scientology, how about that? You hold on to the tin cans and then this guy asks you a bunch of questions, and if you pay enough money you get to join the master race. How's that for a religion ?