George Burns Quotes
I find you have to take each day as it comes and be thankful for who's left and whatever you can still do.
Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.
People are always asking me when I'm going to retire. Why should I? I've got it two ways - I'm still making movies, and I'm a senior citizen, so I can see myself at half price.
At home we ate fish every Friday, as Catholics were then supposed to do. Being Jewish, I compromised. I wore a hat when I ate fish, out of respect for my own religion and the fish's family.
She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting.
In show business the key word is honesty. Once you've learned to fake that, the rest is easy.
Just because you're old that doesn't mean you're more forgetful. The same people whose names I can't remember now I couldn't remember fifty years ago. . .
When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.
When we played the back end of a horse we always knew that if we worked hard and did a good job we could become the front end.
When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
Bridge is a game that separates the men from the boys. It also separates husbands and wives.
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now - I'm booked.
What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.
A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
Dress simply. If you wear a dinner jacket, don't wear anything else on it ... like lunch or dinner.
I drink coffee with my right hand, and I smoke with my left. But I talk with both hands.
People are always asking me how much I'm worth. Well, all I can say is, I've got enough money to last me the rest of my life. As long as I die in the next 20 minutes.
Much later in life, though, Gracie made a major contribution to the opera world. She stayed out of it.
From Paris we took the Orient Express to Vienna. I must say I was terribly disappointed; nobody was murdered on the train.
If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.
If I get big laughs, I'm a comedian. If I get little laughs, I'm a humorist. If I get no laughs, I'm a singer.
I should have been a country-western singer. After all, I'm older than most western countries.
I like women to be attracted to me. See, when you get 60 years old, and they know you're 60, the only women you can get are 55-year-old women, and I like younger women.
It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
Being an actor is easy, just picture someone in a room and you outside waiting for your cue to go in. Elliot Gould's been trying that for forty years.
