Hari Kondabolu Quotes

Telling me that I’m obsessed with talking about racism in America is like telling me I’m obsessed with swimming when I’m drowning.

I don't tie my shoes right. I tie them the way you would tie a gift, like a bow.

I am able to apply certain things to my craft that maybe other comedians don't, because I'm a devotee.

We've never had a female President in this country, which I find stunning

There are some dogs that are gigantic that look like they shouldn't be in existence.

It would be cool for someone to ask me about some of the structural choices I make with my albums.

I've always looked older.

I always have a bit of a look, a bit of a frown.

I'm always kind of in my head thinking.

I am frozen musically somewhere around 2004.

I don't drink before shows.

I'd love for someone to ask me about comedic technique and choices.

I never learned how to tie my shoes, and I was mocked for that. I still don't know how to.

Horse is fine. I'll ride a horse.

I wrote a lot of poetry in the last two years of high school, all about the same girl I was in love with. That was pretty awful. Did you know that in poetry, every line does not need to rhyme?

It's always fun when you see different comics at different weights or with different hair.

There are a lot of times where people think I'm in things that I'm not in, because they think I'm Kumail Nanjiani.

I don't look like a lot of fun. I just don't.

Another stupid thing I believed for a long time was that pizza was supposed to be said peed-za.

For years now, people have mentioned my mustache and get disappointed that when they see me live I don't have a mustache.