JT Fields Quotes

I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.

If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.

After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse.

I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.

I'm searching for loopholes.

The low-ceiling price bazaar for sexual relief was a street called Middie Alley. You could barely get a pushcart through this avenue. Top price-twenty-five cents.

I was almost put out of business by a well-meaning corpse.

The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it.

Don't live in the castles

And meanwhile time goes about its immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit.

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.

I never talk back. I listen and always remember your every word, so come pen or mouse, never forget that I will treasure your thoughts forever. Yours truly, Paper.

My life is my testimony.

It doesn't matter where you've been, only where you are going.

A problem's worst nightmare is a solution. Be the solution!

Be the solution!

If they didn't want to know, they shouldn't have asked.

Never let the sacrifice of others be for nothing by doing nothing.

I refuse to put God into a little box I can handle, for that would insult us both.

Newspaper columnist Dave Barry once wrote that the motto of the wedding industry is, 'Money can't buy you happiness, so you might as well give your money to us.

When a Dragon, an Elf, and a Human walk into a bar, the Human is always going to be the punch line.

Fireball doesn’t need a search warrant.

I will never understand why you Humans weren’t designed to recycle your body’s water after filtering waste. It’s just so much more efficient.

Letting go is impossible when you're holding a grudge." -Faydra D. Fields

When banana's don't work, try a cookie.

Trolls must continually feed their bottomless need, so be strong and patiently wait out their fires of hatred for eventually they eat their own.

The human face shines as it speaks of thingsNear itself, thoughts full of dreams.The human face shines like a dark skyAs it speaks of those things that oppress the living

You stuttered like a kaleidoscope, because you knew too many words.

It's better to die chasing a dream never caught than to die never having chased the dream.

Only parents and torturers and the janitors of holocausts are asked to stand the sound of so much human grief.

I felt like the sky around me was closing me in. Trapping me in some sort of bubble where time stands still and grief would linger on forever.

Think you can live forever, act like today is your last day on earth.

I was in love with a beautiful blond once. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.

You don't have to have a million followers to make an impact on one.

You MUST do what you love. Sometimes your passion will be the only thing that keeps you motivated.

When you start with an insult and end with a compliment, most people only remember where you started.

It's not always easy, but it's usually simple.

If you have to tell them you are, you're usually not. It usually speaks for itself.

Keeping objects from your past comes with memories of your past. Let go of both to move on.

Beware of those who would pay you lip service but refuse to put their money where their mouths are.

Don't depend on anyone else to toot your horn. I mean, do you really want their lips on it, anyway?

Stay off the bandwagon. More likely than not, your own way of getting there makes for a better journey.

What you will endure determines what you will become.

If you're unable to find your face in the dictionary, then take this opportunity to define yourself.

Spending time being can be just as, if not more, fulfilling as spending time doing.

If you are your worst critic, don't be angry if others try to claim the title.

A path full of potholes must be traveled slowly, but there's no reason you can't finish the journey.

When you hide the bodies of the problems, that's how you eventually amass skeletons in your closet.

Keeping up with him would require running, and there is no dignity in running after any man for any reason, injured or not.