Jim Quotes

I believe that life is basically a process of growth-that we go through many lives, choosing those situations and problems that we will learn through.

There will be water and food fights everywhere.

I still put my pants on the same way. I still walk on my pool twice a day.

Ya know what I do almost every day? I wash. Personal hygiene is part of the package with me.

All of life is a risk; in fact we're not going to get out alive. Casualness leads to casualties. Communication is the ability to affect other people with words.

Whenever you've got a choice, do good, kiddo. It isn't always fun or easy, but in the long run it makes your life better.

It's not what happens, it's what you do that determines your future.

Treat the past as a school.

I always wanted to be a shortstop so I could play more often!

Remember that quitting is always an option, and it's the only one that guarantees a predictable result. Stay in the fight and everything is at risk. Quit and you know what will happen NOTHING!

We are all culpable in the death of Christ. My sins, your sins put Him on that cross.

Network marketing is really the greatest source of grass-roots capitalism, because it teaches people how to take a small bit of capital, that is your time, and build the American dream.

Laughter is good medicine for the soul. Our world is desperately in need of more medicine.

I learned very early in my investing careers: I better not invest in what I want. I better invest in what's happening in the world. Otherwise I'll be broke - dead broke.

McDonald's is almost 50 years old. For 47 years we had a pretty consistent track record of being able to deliver admirable sales.

San Francisco, America's B-movie imitation of Paris. San Francisco, the city that ruined punk rock. San Francisco, the most intolerant place in the country.

Fashion is one of the most beautiful forms of art we have. It's a form of art that every person gets to possess and create for themselves.

I prefer for a woman's most private of areas to have as much hair as Carlos Santana's entire band, head to toe, circa 1972.

Whatever you do not employ, you forfeit.

By working hard, you get to play hard guilt-free.

Pie can't compete with cake. Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, someone's drunk in the kitchen.

Everything we would ever need to become rich and powerful and sophisticated is within our reach. The major reason that so few take advantage of all that we have is simply, neglect.

Babies should be classified as an antidepressant. It's pretty hard to be in a bad mood around a 5-month-old baby.

The word "tip" stands for "to insure promptness." So when should you give it? Up front,of course. Sophisticated people don't take chances on poor service, they insure good service.

Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder.

Humans have the remarkable ability to get exactly what they must have. But there is a difference between a 'must' and 'want'.

I don't know, I find that honestly, the stand-up thing in some ways is a little bit of a cliché to carry around, because people don't consider stand-ups really actors.

No one thought up being. He who thinks he has, step forward.

Good acting is about reacting, not tryingto express something, but reacting to a situation as the character.I don't like acting acting.

The greatest gift you can give someone is your personal development.

In the words of the ancients, one should make his decision within the space of seven breaths. It is a matter of being determined and having the spirit to break through to the other side.

There's a trench coat and a tragedy in your future.

For every promise, there is a price to pay... If the promise is clear, the price is easy.

Most laws condemn the soul and pronounce sentence. The result of the law of my God is perfect. It condemns but forgives. It restores - more than abundantly - what it takes away.

Magic. It can get a guy killed.

Spiritual warfare is the unseen battle God wages on your behalf.

You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast.

Fear is a part of life. It's a warning mechanism. That's all. It tells you when there's danger around. Its job is to help you survive. Not cripple you into being unable to do it.

Take time to gather up the past so that you will be able to draw from your experience and invest them in the future.

Magic comes from what is inside you. It is a part of you. You can't weave together a spell that you don't beleive in.

Likest thou jelly within thy doughnut?

It’s not how you start that’s important, but how well you finish!

Everybody has a gun in their car in Detroit.

Gimme: An agreement between two losers who can't putt.

Losing is no disgrace if you've given your best.

The sky over Patusan was blood-red, immense, streaming like an open vein. An enormous sun nestled crimson amongst the treetops, and the forest below had a black and forbidding face.

It's not your schedule that keeps you from praying, it's your failure to realize the importance of prayer.

Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.

Life is meant to be fun, and joyous, and fulfilling.

Everything was perfectly healthy and normal here in Denial Land.