Lois Greiman, Unzipped Quotes
Just when you think you have life by the tail, it's likely to whip around and take a hunk outta your balls.
Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court.
Some people are street-smart, some people are book-smart, but most people are just dumber than dirt.
Just remember this, Missy, escargot ain't nothin' but snails with their noses stuck in the air.
Fair play is all well and good. But knowing how to kick 'em in the balls can get you out of a jam 9 times out of 10.
The theory of relativity doesn't amount to a hill of beans when there's a bonfire in your shorts.
You lose a couple of pounds and get a guy good and drunk, you could have a hell of a good time even if you are not smart.
There is no greater hell than realizing you're in love with the guy you hate.
Maybe curiosity did kill your cat. But it wouldn't hurt to keep an eye on the neighbor's rottweiler just the same.
Maybe life does suck, Pork Chop, but it beats the hell out of the alternative.
Some men are warriors and some men are weenies. The trick is figuring out which is which.
Booze and boys, ain't nothing in the universe that'll make a girl stupid faster.
Analyzing dreams is much like walking on water. There are a limited number of people who do it well.
A pigs and pain, until you really get to know 'em. Then he's a paid with the soul.
Even choosing the perfect dinner wine loses its earth-shattering importance if your guests happen to be cannibals, and you, the unsuspecting entree.