R. H. Dana Quotes
I don't find biology as interesting as politics and humanism. I talk more about existential stuff.
I always tend to think of all of my shows as possibly my last show. I'm like a junior Springsteen, without the underbite.
When you put four Alaskans into a room, you have five marriages, six divorces, and seven political parties.
When you least feel like it, do something for someone else. You forget about your own situation. It gives you a purpose, as opposed being sorrowful and lonely.
If Jesus was a baby, there was a point, on that Holiest of nights, in that Holiest of mangers, where he made a big, Holy load.
I don't want to say my mom is late on trends, but this morning she said, Have a shagadelic day, sweetheart.
Earthquakes would be great if they could hit specific areas, like the parent lounge at a children's beauty pageant.
There's no going back from what happened. You can go back and understand the past, but you can't go back and change it.
Do you need an audience to create work, or does not having an audience liberate you and make you a truer artist?
I once felt bad because I had no shoes, and then I met a man who had no feet. He was wearing an ankle bracelet that kept falling off.
As has often been said, a ship is like a lady's watch, always out of repair.
It's important to have the diversity of thought and approach that comes with being a woman.
I have always felt that whatever the divine Providence permitted to occur, I was not too proud to report.
I've learned through experience that life is never that bad. The secret is just paying attention to how you feel and not letting anyone else dictate what in your heart you know is right.
Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.
My dog keeps looking at me as if he knows my secret, as if he and he alone can see my soul. That or he wants this pork chop.
Thou little bird, thou dweller by the sea, Why takest thou its melancholy voice, And with that boding cry Along the waves dost thou fly? Oh! rather, bird, with me Through this fair land rejoice!
I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.
As Global Warming raises temparatures, it takes longer to cool pies on window sills, and I wonder if this whole thing was caused by hobos.
Getting plastic surgery in your late 70's, it's kind of like painting your house as the fire approaches. Just die, there's no shame in it.
Scatterbrain is one of those harmless little words you use a million times... Then it turns up in a crime scene description.
The gun legislation was doomed the minute it became associated with the words common sense.
Have you ever dated a Goth chick for four or five months until you realized she was just an Orthodox Jew? They have the same costumes.
A great way to be left alone on the subway is to appear to be deep in conversation with a small knife.
My whole approach to marriage is simple: my wife will do something that drives me insane, I won't say anything, and then, later, I'll die of cancer.
Approached literally, there's but a hair's difference between You'd better not pout, you'd better not cry, and Don't scream.
I don't want to appear to be placing blame, but as far my life is concerned, everything is pretty much my dad's ball's fault.
For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.
My father hauled boxes so I could get an education and earn enough money to pay someone to make me lift weights.
I grew up in a town called Hopedale, Massachusetts. I was born there in 1964, and the only thing I hate outside of myself is everything else.
The magazine at the health food store said, Stop Aging! Isn't that what death is for? Trust me, we're all gonna stop aging.
Somewhere a woman is praying her toddler wins a beauty pageant. I say this because sometimes people wonder why God lets tornadoes happen.
I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
