R. W. Patterson Quotes

A lot of times you get people writing wonderful sentences and paragraphs, and they fall in love with their prose style, but the stories really aren't that terrific.

People always come up to me and say, 'you should do standup.' It's nice to discover things about yourself. That keeps everything lively and fun.

Can I come in? No! I'm in a towel! I'm blind!

Once I was seated, I couldn't help people-watching. I'll admit it, I'm an addict from way back.

Fang, fang. I love you. I looooove you. I love you thiiiiiiiiiis much!

Sometimes he seems like a droid--or a drone. Fang of Nine. Fang2-D2.

Then I went to bed and cried into my pillow. I wasn't sad, not at all. It was just so beautiful to have an intense feeling and the right words at the same time. What are we but our stories?

The best way to get kids reading more is to give them books that they'll gobble up - and that will make them ask for another.

He's gonna be fine," I confirmed. Can we see him?" Iggy asked. Ig, I hate to break it to you, but you're blind.

How is San Francisco, Alex? Lovely city. Will you leave your heart there? Do you think it's a good place to die?

You're children. Don't you want a home, a family?" "With, like, vitamin-fortified cereal and educational television?

What, eBay isn't good enough for us?

Fang looked at me, hope in his eyes, and I smirked at him. I save the huge emotional kissy-face for imminent death scenes. This probably didn't qualify.

What I'm really addicted to is getting people to understand that if their kids aren't competent readers coming out of middle school, it's really going to be hard for them in high school.

Excellent. They were flammable.

Jane-Sweetie, we've talked about your weight-" my mother began. I'm only eight years old," I said. "How about I promise to be anorexic later?

I hoped I wasn't actually dead. That would make finding our parents and saving the world really hard.

When your own romantic life is falling apart, everyone else's looks fabulous.

Do we have any chlorine? It seems to be kind of explosive when mixed with other stuff." "Like what, your socks? No, we don't have chlorine. No swimming pool.

Have you been playing in toxic waste lately?

My invite must have gotten lost in the mail," she said venomously. "But I don't mind crashing this party. -Maximum Ride talking to Max II

Love means you can never be apart.

Boy, you just can't kill people like you used to.

Sometimes a happy delusion is better than grim reality.

Lots of women are gifting themselves with diamonds for their right hand.

I stood there watching Phoebe arrange the pillows and the sheets. She isn't thinking that I... I mean, she doesn't think that she and I would... WHAT?

So Fnick, can I change channel?" Iggy asked. "There's a game on." "Make yourself at home, Figgy." Fang said.

After all, Fnick is Superman," said Iggy. "Shut up, Jeff," I said, but I was smiling. I lifted Iggy's fingers to my face so that he knew.

You know things have gone bad when military marches pass for pop music.

"Disappear where?" You know what they say: curiosity killed the mutant bird kid. But I couldn't help myself.

Here's a freebie: Don't play poker with a kid who can read minds.

Sometimes when you're at your most certain, that's when everything you know is wrong.

You really are a scary man,no really! If I had boots I would be quaking in them.

Keep this in mind: there are no coincidences.

Bombs are good. I love bombs."--Iggy

This is my brain: O This is my brain after making out with Fang: * It's very sad.

Please, sit down," Sharon said with another hair toss. I made a mental note to practice doing that in a mirror the next time I saw one. it seemed a useful skill, right up there with roundhouse kicks.

Jackpot, Max! Jackpot!" It was Fang and he was giggling hysterically. For those of you just joining us, Fang doesn't giggle, esspecially hysterically.

Louisiana, the state road maintenance forgot.

I have a number of writers I work with regularly. I write an outline for a book. The outlines are very specific about what each scene is supposed to accomplish.

It's okay, Ig." said Fang. "Just give it your best shot." Sometimes the Fangster is incredibly supportive, just not with me.

He gives my hand a tight squeeze, but that desperation, that urgency between us is gone. No insecurities. Max and Fang. Fang and Max. No longer a question. We just are.

I am not a great prose stylist. I'm a storyteller. There are thousands of people who don't like what I do. Fortunately, there are millions who do.

It's always refreshing to meet someone crazier than us," I said. "We seem so normal afterward.

Angel: What's sauerkraut? Max: You don't want it. Trust me.

Iggy. This is not a democracy," I said,(...)"It's a Maxocracy.

Fang? Are you- like Max?" asked Dr. Martinez. "Nope,"he said, sounding bored. "I'm the smart one." I resisted the urge to kick him in the shin.

Was this normalcy-predictable patterns, the certainty of doing the same thing everyday? Because if so, normalcy was about to make me freak out and start screaming.

It was like meeting someone out of your dreams, or fantasies, or a beloved character from a favorite book.

I'll just ask now: What is it about my persona that draws every insane, power-hungry nutcase to me like a magnet?