Robin Williams Quotes

The human spirit is more powerful than any drug - and that is what needs to be nourished: with work, play, friendship, family. These are the things that matter.

Change is not popular; we are creatures of habit as human beings. 'I want it to be the way it was.' But if you continue the way it was there will be no 'is.'

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus.

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.

My battles with addiction definitely shaped how I am now. They really made me deeply appreciate human contact. And the value of friends and family, how precious that is.

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?

There's three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular basis, and a navy blazer.

Ballet: men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.

We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race.

The things we fear the most have already happened to us.

Compassionate conservative. I don't know what that is, it sounds like a Volvo with a gun rack.

I love running cross-country...You come up a hill and see two deer going, 'What the hell is he doing?' On a track I feel like a hamster.

But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.

Seize the day. Make your life extraordinary.

Our job is improving the quality of life, not just delaying death.

My children give me a great sense of wonder. Just to see them develop into these extraordinary human beings.

I always thought the idea of education was to learn to think for yourself.

You might say he was one taco short of a combination platter.

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.

I've actually gone to the zoo and had monkeys shout to me from their cages, "I'm in here when you're walking around like that?"

Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.

The human body was designed by a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area ?

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.

I do believe in love; it's wonderful - especially love third time around, it's even more precious; it's kind of amazing.

But only in their dreams can men be truly free. It was always thus and always thus will be.

When I was growing up they used to say, "Robin, drugs can kill you." Now that I'm 58 my doctor's telling me, "Robin, you need drugs to live." I realize now that my doctor is also my dealer.

Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it 'all the money,' but they changed it to 'alimony.' It's ripping your heart out through your wallet.

Gentlemen, haven't we learned anything from the music of John Lennon? All we need is love.

I try to make sense of things. Which is why, I guess, I believe in destiny. There must be a reason that I am as I am. There must be.

Just now when I said, "I have a crush on you," you didn't say, "no way loser". I'd rather have a lobotomy by a leper. That means something

You can start any 'Monty Python' routine and people finish it for you. Everyone knows it like shorthand.

You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you'll win, no matter what the outcome.

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll say stop again.'

It's great that we've got a compassionate conservative, but to me, that sounds like a Volvo with a gun rack.

It's five o'clock in the morning. You've just pissed on a dumpster. It's Miller time.

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party.

The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them of Leonid Brezhnev.

We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.

Having George W. Bush giving a lecture on business ethics is like having a leper give you a facial, it just doesn't work!

Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer: You can do it, just not as well as the others, really.

Don't mess with me, man, I'm a lawyer!

All you have to do is think one happy thought, and you'll fly like me.

A human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.

Seize the day. Because, believe it or not, each and every one of us in this room is one day going to stop breathing, turn cold, and die.

[when asked about what he was most thankful about]: Being alive. After heart surgery, you dig that part. Breath, family and friends are just amazing. Just to have a second shot is pretty great!

I used food to make myself feel better, but I felt worse when I ate.

Sucking the marrow out of life doesn't mean choking on the bone.

I love doing live action movies, but there's a great job in doing animation, especially one with music.

Reality: What a concept!

Come on now! You kick out the gooks, the next thing you know, you have to kick out the chinks, the spicks, the spooks, the kikes and all that's going to be left is a couple of brain-dead rednecks.