Steve Coogan Quotes

I did not become successful in my work through embracing or engaging in celebrity culture. I never signed away my privacy in exchange for success.

If you chase something too desperately, it eludes you.

When I was a student I was very, very ambitious, completely immersed in my comedy career. I never had that period of reckless hedonism that you should get out of your system in your youth.

I don't like big feet. It reminds me of gammon.

If things don't come easy to you, you have to pull a rabbit out of a hat.

Me, myself, personally, I like to keep myself private. I have never said I am a paragon of virtue, a model of morality. I simply do what I do.

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny, you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny.

The truth is somewhere in the middle of funny and serious.

I think if you try to look for something to show off as an actor, vanity can get the better of you.

I am of the very last generation who didn't have computers at school. As we grow old we'll become something of an aberration.

But with comedy it's a simple premise. If it's funny, people laugh. If it's not, they don't.

Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot.

Hacking into a victim of crime's phone is a sort of poetically elegant manifestation of a modus operandi the tabloids have.

People regurgitate the same old cliches and it becomes like a photocopy of a photocopy of something that's vaguely interesting.

A friend of mine once said he like his women like his parmesan: strong smelling and shaved. I don't agree with that, but I don't like hairy women.

I like the transience of Klimt paintings.

Actors say they do their own stunts for the integrity of the film but I did them because they looked like a lot of fun.

I've always been drawn to discomfort and that limbo of unease you get between comedy and tragedy.

If it was just the potatoes that were affected, at the end of the day you will pay the price if you're a fussy eater.

I'm gonna hump ya. Like Deputy Dog... Would hump ya.

Guide dogs for the blind. It's cruel really, isn't it? Getting a dog to lead a man round all day. Not fair on either of them.

A lot of people can be very scared about making themselves vulnerable and appearing uncool. I don't really give a damn; as long as it's funny, I'll do it [make fun of myself].

I have never wanted to be famous, as such - fame is a by-product.

Actually, bizarrely, in America, I get more appreciation from the odd, unusual stuff I've done, almost because I'm not, if you like, famous in America as I am in England.

When Americans talks about Europeans, they are thinking Britain and the rest of Europe. When we [ Britains] talk about Europeans, we talk about everywhere else.

I'm getting older , so I'm quieting down a bit.

As soon as I see period costume, I turn off. It's like hearing drama on Radio 4.

Even great people are always slightly disappointing, which is generally what makes them interesting.

I find impressionists slightly annoying, really.

I happen to have a public profile. Ditto newspaper editors. It's a result of what I do, not an end.

Convoy? Michael, you're hanging around with a man who uses a collective term for a single vehicle.

I don't think I'm kind of universally known. I think in the indie world I'm probably better known than in some mainstream Hollywood terms.

Comedy is unique in the sense that laughter is a palpable noise that everyone makes.

There's never any graffiti in the hotel. Although in the Gents a couple of weeks ago I did see someone had drawn a lady's part. Quite detailed. The guy obviously had talent.

You really have got lots of issues! Yeah, of 'What Car Magazine'!

What I don't like is dance music or hip hop or any of that sort of thing.

I think it's always funny when you see kids do Shakespeare.

I think you need to have the guts to not use comedy. Often, the people that work in comedy use a joke to avoid contemplation.

I'm an entertainer. I don't go round saying I'm a paragon of virtue, so that is clearly not in the public interest.

What terrifies me is that I might somehow endorse that view so people think they don't have to read books anymore.

No one has a monopoly on wisdom, and even for people who aren't religious, you can learn things from religious people.

I don't go to premieres, unless I'm contractually bound to.

I don't like new bands. I don't want to be one of those pathetic old men in their forties who knows exactly what 18-year-olds are into.

I don't think there's anything outside what comedy can address.

Two fat ladies, 88! Not that you'd find these ladies at a bingo hall, of course... they're altogether a higher class of fat lady.

When I see friends from school I think they've all grown old and I've stayed the same.

There were days when we used to say, what was in today's paper is tomorrow's fish-and-chip paper.When I became successful, I enjoyed myself a little.

It's arguably the best newspaper in the world.

Yeah, all drama teachers are very effusive, very demonstrative, very emotionally open, very big, and gesticulate a lot, and are very physical.

I'm 47, my girlfriend's 33; she's 14 years younger than me: Back of the net!