T Cooper Quotes

Listen at me. The end is almost never far off any time at all!

If it's boring, then it's tiring.

So if I keep making mistakes on Broadway or tape or film, producing, directing or acting, I can go along and do it - so long as I'm not investing too much capital in these things.

America owes most of its social prejudices to the exaggerated religious opinions of the different sects which were so instrumental in establishing the colonies.

Christ, in the parable of the vine dressers, has taught us a sublime lesson of justice, by showing that to the things which are not our own, we can have no just claim.

The very existence of government at all, infers inequality. The citizen who is preferred to office becomes the superior of those who are not, so long he is the repository of power.

A refined simplicity is the characteristic of all high bred deportment, in every country, and a considerate humanity should be the aim of all beneath it.

Superstition is a quality that seems indigenous to the ocean.

These families, you know, are our upper crust, not upper ten thousand.

Everybody says it, and what everybody says must be true.

On the human imagination events produce the effects of time.

Colonialism has a bad reputation in the modern context, but Colonial Africa was a far better place for both black and white before the colonists gave up.

If you feel compelled to give a New Year's Eve party, don't invite people to arrive too early or they'll go off the boil before midnight.

People who can write a book usually do.

I was so flattered that someone wanted me to write a book, I said I would. It was published in 1969.

And I would really like to be a grandmother, but only when Felix or Emily meet the right person and are ready.

I'm basically a very happy person and I don't have to be anybody else.

I think we ought to have a kindness year, or a kindness century.

Leo, sadly, has Parkinsons, but he used to cook all sorts of dazzling things.

I live at home and, if I want to start work at 11 o'clock, I can.

I'd never have written the big books in London.

It took the first 204 years of our Nation's history to accumulate $1 trillion in debt. And now we are doing that every 2 or 3 years.

While tax refunds amount to substantial income for many Americans, current IRS rules do not allow taxpayers to directly deposit their refund into more than one account.

Take the veto. Bush is the first president since James Garfield in 1881 not to veto a single bill. Garfield only had six months in office; Bush has had over four years.

The police had already found the cartridges and the rifles and the bag in the Texas School Depository and within a half an hour, those facts were known.

Vegas is purposefully constructed as a self-enclosed and isolated biosphere, sort of what a recreational colony built on the moon might be like.

In the end, all it takes is one small action, by one person. One at a time.

The future cannot blame the present, just as the present cannot blame the past. The hope is always here, always alive, but only your fierce caring can fan it into a fire to warm the world.

So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'

I went into a butchers and I said, 'I'll have a pound of sausages. 'He said, 'I'm very sorry, sir, we only serve kilos in here. 'I said, 'Okay then I'll have a pound of kilos.'

He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library. I thought, "That's a turn-up for the books".

A man walks into a bar, and he said OUCH, cause it was an iron bar.

Two fish in a tank, one says to the other - you drive I'll man the guns.

I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'

My wife had a go at me last night. She said, Youll drive me to my grave. I had the car out in thirty seconds.

Two peanuts walk into a rather rough bar, not looking for any trouble. Unfortunately, one was a salted.

Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'

I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind?' So he gave me a kite.

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

I just try and learn to be a good husband and be a good father before I am a good rock star. That means saying no to certain things that go with the business.

You can get spiritual things out of books and stories and they have nothing to do with religion.

Freedom to rock, freedom to talk. Freedom, raise your fist and yell.

Nobody and nothing beats The Simpsons. Even after all this time, it's still the best satire since Monty Python.

Slade was the coolest band in England. They were the kind of guys that would push your car out of a ditch.

If somebody had told me that you have a choice of being a rock star or playing left field for the Tigers, there would not have been a choice at all. I would have said, 'Where's my locker?'

If it's total freedom, I guess the ultimate thing you can go into is total silence between the audience and performer, with the performer projecting something he doesn't even have to play.

While friends and lovers mourn your silly grave, I have other uses for you, darling. I love the dead.

They should invent some way to tape-record your dreams. I've written songs in my dreams that were Beatles songs. Then I'd wake up and they'd be gone.

Anytime you stop and talk to somebody and you learn about them, you start to walk in their shoes a little bit and you see things through a different lens.

Do you get the anger that is out here?