Tim Dorsey Quotes
My problem is with the warped value system our culture has. Why is it that if you knife a woman in a movie it's PG, but if you swear at her it's rated R and if you make love to her it's rated X?
A prosthetic leg with a Willie Nelson bumper sticker washed ashore on the beach, which meant it was Florida. Then it got weird.
Murder is such a charged word. You know how some people fixate and won't let things go? They're called cops.
Hang on to your dreams with everything you got. Because the best life is when your dreams come true. The second-best is when they don't but you never stop chasing them.
Nature's what it's all about, but our people have been brainwashed into thinking that life is a cell phone against your head and the TV on a beer commercial with hot chicks.
Don't make fun of people who are different. Unless they have more money and influence. Then you must
Look forward to the wonderment of growing up, raising a family and driving by the gas station where the popular kids now work.
These are different animals now. They're starting to winnow out the weak at the fringe of the herd. We need to hurry or this could affect our snack situation.
Our political process appears to be a toxic dance of mutually assured destruction that takes all the citizens down with you, and that can't be right. So I've prepared a little experiment.
But instead they tell you they'll come to fix your cable between noon and five, and I say, okay, I'll pay my next bill between July and November, but they don't laugh.
Do you think heaven's like that?Could be worse, said Serge. You know all those pushy people who keep telling us we're not going to heaven? It could be full of them instead.