Tom Robbins Quotes

Reality whistles a different tune underwater.

We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.

Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide.

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak.

The beet is the most intense of vegetables

Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.

It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful.

To achieve the impossible; it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.

We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.

The trickster's function is to break taboos, create mischief, stir things up. In the end, the trickster gives people what they really want, some sort of freedom.

People write memoirs because they lack the imagination to make things up.

On their sofas of spice and feathers, the concubines also slept fretfully. In those days the Earth was still flat, and people dreamed often of falling over edges.

there are two kinds of people in this world : those who believe there are two kinds of people in this world and those who are smart enough to know better.

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans.

O tequila, savage water of sorcery, what confusion and mischief your sly, rebellious drops do generate

The only authority I respect is the one that causes butterflies to fly south in fall and north in springtime.

When freedom is outlawed, only outlaws will be free.

Eating a raw oyster is like french kissing a mermaid.

Breathe properly. Stay curious. And eat your beets.

There are only two mantras, yum and yuck, mine is yum.

Our similarities bring us to a common ground; Our differences allow us to be fascinated by each other.

Never underestimate how much assistance, how much satisfaction, how much comfort, how much soul and transcendence there might be in a well-made taco and a cold bottle of beer.

Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is sign on as its accomplice.

It's never too late to have a happy childhood.

There are many things worth living for, a few things worth dying for, and nothing worth killing for.

True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced. A truly stable system expects the unexpected, is prepared to be disrupted, waits to be transformed.

Madame Lily Devalier always asked "Where are you?" in a way that insinuated that there were only two places on earth one could be: New Orleans and somewhere ridiculous.

Does koala bear poop smell like cough drops?

There is no such thing as a weird human being, It's just that some people require more understanding than others.

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need.

Using words to describe magic is like using a screwdriver to cut roast beef.

But why diminish your soul being run-of-the-mill at something? Mediocrity: now there is ugliness for you. Mediocrity's a hairball coughed up on the Persian carpet of Creation.

Leave me in the night but please don't leave me in the dark

Here's an idea: let's get over ourselves, buy a cherry pie, and go fall in love with life.

Outlaws, like lovers, poets, and tubercular composers who cough blood onto piano keys, do their finest work in the slippery rays of the moon.

Love is dope, not chicken soup.

Something has got to hold it together. I'm saying my prayers to Elmer, the Greek god of glue.

When I sit down to write, I just let the goose out of the bottle.

The Earth is God's pinball machine and each quake, tidal wave, flash flood and volcanic eruption is the result of a TILT that occurs when God, cheating, tries to win free games.

Curiosity, especially intellectual inquisitiveness, is what separates the truly alive from those who are merely going through the motions.

And it rained a fever. And it rained a silence. And it rained a sacrifice. And it rained a miracle. And it rained sorceries and saturnine eyes of the totem.

Of the Seven Dwarfs, the only one who shaved was Dopey. That should tell us something about the wisdom of shaving.

Are you aware that rushing toward a goal is a sublimated death wish? It's no coincidence we call them 'deadlines.'

A hamburger is an icon of layered circles, the circle being at once the most spiritual and the most sensual of shapes.

Of course I'm inconsistent! Only logicians and cretins are consistent!

Let us live for the beauty of our own reality.

Those who shun the whimsy of things will experience rigor mortis before death.

Each time we exhale, the world ends; when we inhale, there can be, if we allow it, rebirth and spiritual renewal. It all transpires inside of us. In our consciousness, in our hearts. All the time.

Amnesia is not knowing who one is and wanting desperately to find out. Euphoria is not knowing who one is and not caring. Ecstasy is knowing exactly who one is - and still not caring.