Comedy Quotes

I love 30 Rock. It's one of my favorite shows. It's certainly the gold standard of comedy writing.

I've always read books and loved human behavior since I was ten or twelve years old. Maybe even that's why I wanted to do comedy.

It's funny, 99% of the time, haters and the 1 they hate on have everything in common and could be best friends.

I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because nobody trusts that I can do it.

I work with a lot of kids. Every year, for the past fifteen years, I work at Comedy Camp where I work with a lot of kids.

I've lived (in LA) for so long, I don't even know what is real and what isn't anymore.

I do think I am funny, or I wouldn't be where I am today. I do think there is always room for improvement and learning.

Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince.

Comedy doesn't really have any meaning without sadness. The most meaningful comedy comes from some really serious pathos.

When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.

The funny thing is, about the time I let go of any aspiration toward worldly success, that's about the time I started writing decent work.

When I first hit the scene, it was just a lot of go, go, go, go, go. I have a lot of natural energy anyway, but it was over the top.

I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching.

I did stand-up comedy for seventeen years. I need to explore other things.

I was being chased by a giant crab. That's not funny.

I think that people who do enjoy my stand-up comedy and the people who get it and the people who are taken in by it, they see that I'm a guy that has love of the game.

I had never done a roast, but I really wanted to, because it's so different from standup.

The whole thing with comedy is that you are always in control. Writer, director, actor, producer, and sometimes bouncer. And you are just a piece of their puzzle.

It's funny, particularly when you're a writer and you're doing well, you have that sense of like, "Oh! My view of the world is the one that's going to be published."

People get into stand-up comedy by and large because they're smart and they have a perspective.

Michael Jackson wanted to be in Men in Black II. He told me he had seen the first Men in Black in Paris and had stayed behind and sat there and wept. I had to explain to him that it was a comedy.

I'm the Forrest Gump of comedy.

It's harder and harder to make a well-done romantic comedy these days because the conventions have been so played out.

e foundation to a good friendship is trust but the foundation to good comedy is by betraying your friends.

I got lucky. I won the San Francisco Stand-Up Comedy Competition in 1977 while I was still at San Francisco State.

Well, I loved variety in television, I loved sketch comedy. At 'Saturday Night Live,' I stayed almost seven years.

I don't know what's funny and what's not so I test out all of my material in front of audiences.

I would like to work in both comedy and drama. I'd love to do a really juicy drama that's just really real.

I've always enjoyed family movies anyway. And I grew up loving actors who could hop around and play in something very family friendly, big, playful - and then go and do drama and comedy as well.

I'm a big comedy fan, and a fan of films.

All my drawings always sort of looked funny even if I was trying to do serious stuff and express myself about grim situations. It was always cartoony.

I directed a half hour comedy pilot, 'Upgrade,' and had one of the best times ever! I had such a great time directing; I would love to get to direct another project.

I don't know what I'd do if I was making a romantic comedy; I wouldn't feel like I was earning my $100 a day.

In terms of magnifying it and making it plausible, I'm a great believer in truth in comedy.

I'll get laughs in the places I don't want them and that makes me realize the direction I want to go in. I don't mean to get too deep into comedy here.

It's funny, because I'm a man of strong opinions and when I make one, I stand by it even if it starts to appear incorrect to me after a while.

I think comedy comes more from a low sense of self-esteem, and I certainly have that.

I can't think of any bank robbery comedy where it's about two normal guys. It's kind of like Superbad meets Heat, which is a cool combo, and it's just fun doing a normal guy that's robbing a bank.

I'm not opposed to doing science fiction or comedy, but there has to be respect. I refuse to be the joke, the fat woman joke, in any movie. I've turned down roles.

Its funny - when you look at the real A-listers nowadays, look at how many live in and around Hollywood. Most of them live on a ranch in Utah. Its no coincidence these guys get in and get out.

I knew comedy was the thing for me when I was the only Asian kid in high school... who failed math.

I don't think there are hour comedies, but if there were, I would have been open to it.

Comedy doesn't always have to come from a dark place.

Fat is where comedy is stored.

I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny.

It's funny, because I never think of myself as Little Miss All-Together.

Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors.

Is this the 5:00 Free Crack Giveaway?

Funny how a wife can spot a blonde hair at twenty yards, yet miss the garage doors.

When a man says he sees nothing in a book, he very often means that he does not see himself in it: which, if it is not a comedy or a satire, is likely enough.