Foibles Quotes

He could sell the Pope on financing a Mormon tabernacle.

Mercifully one forgets one's love affairs as one forgets one's dreams.

I'm not at all stuck up . . . although judging from those around me I have every right to be.

I have my standards. They may be low but I have them.

Show me someone who never gossips and I'll show you someone who isn't interested in people.

I always read the last page of a book first so that if I die before I finish I'll know how it turned out.

Well-adjusted means you can make the same mistakes over and over again and keep smiling.

When someone sings his own praises he always gets the tune too high.

Let's just say he has too many pigeons on his antenna.

I've got nothing against girls in tight sweaters - darn it!

Laugh and the world laughs with you snore and you sleep alone.

She's not moody. She's just known for her versatility of emotions.

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said "No bablo ingles."

I may have faults but being wrong ain't one of them.

We'd all like a reputation for generosity and we'd all like to buy it cheap.

I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing other patients.

It gives me great strength to know that half the people I meet are below average.

When compelled to cook I produce a meal that would make a sword swallower gag.

Horse sense is what keeps horses from betting on what people will do.