Hilarious Quotes

Mockery be damned, my urine looked delicious.

Victoria's got her secrets. Hey, so do I!

I don't lack for bed partners, so I don't need to scrounge for unwilling scraps.-Spade

Roz to Amelia (the house ghost): How considerate of you, after trying to kill me, to see that I don't catch a cold.

I dare you to call Ask-A-Nurse and tell them you feel a presence in your womb region.

Shakira is a new friend, but I love her dearly already. She's so sweet and adorable and hilarious.

It's just funny that Americans have to contend with 2000 channels, and 60 different specific news sources, and the confusion that it creates, and the junk that we get to see is hilarious.

One of my big inspirations was Céleste Mogador. She was a courtesan who wrote her memoirs in order to pay off her debts, which is a hilarious gesture.

I don't really have time to watch too much, but I like 'Family Guy' and 'Entourage.' I'm also obsessed with the YouTube series 'Balls of Steel.' It's hilarious.

Please don't drive drunk, okay? Seriously... But by all means, walk drunk. That looks hilarious. Everyone loves to watch someone act like they are trying to make it to safety during a hurricane.

Comedy ages quicker than tragedy, to the extent that we can't know if the 10 commandments may originally have been 10 hilarious one-liners.

I find it hilarious that there are academics who try to analyse chemical changes in the brains of students while exposing them to gags.

I have found that she is as kind and caring a person as she is hilarious. Simply put, Amy Poehler is my hero.

All the photographers were trying to just get me off, which was hilarious. But it was very, very amusing.

I have 40-something intros [that Davis Jr. did]; all are different, none of them happened. And it was hilarious.

Smart, truly hilarious, and entirely sympathetic. Like a hot bubble bath or a holiday at the beach, you won't want it to end.

My wife thinks I'm a narcissist, but I just think it's hilarious going on YouTube and seeing these covers. There are so many of them - literally hundreds! It's flattering.

I love Queen. Not all of it. Some of it, I can't get into. But "Don't Stop Me Now" is a pretty hilarious song. It's a good pick-me-up in the car.

I think it's hilarious when middle-aged white men try to take themselves seriously. It makes me laugh.

I love what Joe Eszterhas written about Bill Clinton. It's hilarious, Clinton as a rock star, which is the way we should remember him.

I find what I do for a living really funny. I mean, acting is kind of a hilarious thing for a grown man to call a job.

I wouldn't feel right wearing clothes covering my body.

That is the problem with comedy in India. Spoofing sells. Come up with original comedy about the hilarious nation we are, with funny accents and odd rituals, and we get into trouble.

Multi-Choice question: My dishwasher is: efficient; hilarious.

Robin Williams, another person I didn't know. He is genuinely hilarious.

[Ryan Reynolds] is my favorite [ on Top Gear] - I think he's the most hilarious actor who just has not been able to catch a break in terms of being known as the most hilarious actor.

I happen to think singing is hilarious, especially when it pops out at the wrong time.

I have a really great show jacket from Lavalliere thats really well made, and I have a great pair of Gucci jodhpurs, which is hilarious.

Cyndi Lauper was hilarious and generous, someone I'd loved from childhood who didn't disappoint.

Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.

The thing you realize pretty quickly, though, is that being in front of an audience whose job it is to laugh is a big pressure if the writing is not hilarious.

A lot of people dont think of my work as being all that funny, but I think its hilarious!

God will forgive me. It's his job." Heine said this on his deathbed (1856). Hilarious. He must have thought that up years before and counted the seconds to use it.

My wife gets mad because we'll be in the middle of something and I'll stop and say, 'No, I've got to write this down!' She'll say, 'No! We're in a discussion!' I say, 'I know, but it's hilarious!

I'm big on facial expressions, and I'm big on mannerisms, which I find to be hilarious.

I worked with Adam Pally and he's hilarious and the king of improv!

Smart, sharp, and hilarious, Slaughterhouse 90210 is the perfect pick-me-up and never-put-me-down book.

I think Damien Hirst is hilarious. And I think he's a true artist. He's not hilarious first; I think he is a real artist, and I also think he's got an amazing sense of humor.

Is this chicken or is this fish?

Regular panelists on shows can be terrifying. They own that space, and many guest comics suspect they are favoured in the edit, while their own hilarious jokes end up being ejected into the ether.

I am so out of the loop. I am never honored. My career is hilarious to me. I am either under the radar or over the radar.

I love hipsters! Yes, I think they're hilarious. The really cute ones try to look ugly just to prove "I can't be ugly." Normcore was kind of funny too.

When you look up 'hilarious' in the dictionary, there's a picture of you.

I know my life is full of awkward pauses, and I think it's hilarious.

There are only so many hilarious actors so when they cross-pollinate, people assume it's always the same actors and directors.

Humor is his defense mechanism, so that would allow me to talk about some serious subjects, but get a lot of hilarious jokes in.

How many times can you say, "No yanking on one another's genitals?" Everything is hilarious until someone starts crying.

My folks are hilarious extroverts and have always been very supportive of all my artistic endeavors. I'm really lucky to come from such an encouraging family.

What I really want to do is to write a hilarious farce.

Amy [ Schumer] is a really, really hilarious writer.She's super funny, and I feel like the core of our senses of humor is really similar.