Hilarious Quotes

I was a huge fan of 'Arrested Development,' and there's just something it tickles in me and it's bright and it's hilarious.

My favorite lie was the online rumor that Bruce Willis was my uncle. That's hilarious.

My son thinks I'm hilarious, but he's only 1.

Kafka thought his stories were hilarious. We don't necessarily have that reaction to them, but he certainly laughed his head off every time he read them out loud.

Breezy, sophisticated, hilarious, rude and aching with sweetness: LOVE, NINA might be the most charming book I've ever read.

I've been waiting years to have a conversation with Franchesa [Ramsey]! She's so funny and wicked smart. So that's really going to be the experience it's going to intelligent, layered, and hilarious.

If you're a kid who was not especially a star in your high school, I recommend going to a college in the middle of nowhere. I got all the attention I could ever have wanted.

'Chappie' would be like 'RoboCop,' but hilarious. If you mixed 'Robocop' with 'E.T.' and it was... funny, that's what it is.

In bed watching Family Guy. Love this show.! So hilarious! Stewie is my favorite :) love his accent.

So many stars who have shows are intimidated by having people around them be funnier than them. It's always the unsuccessful ones. Look at Seinfeld - he's great because he let everyone be hilarious.

It was just hilarious how my first reaction was, "Oh, no, it's another vampire show. I'm not interested." And then, I read the script and thought it was brilliant.

The saint is hilarious when he is crushed with difficulties because the thing is so ludicrously impossible to anyone but God.

Michael, don’t,” Eve said. “He won’t hurt us.” Andeveryone rolled their eyes at that. Even Jason, which was borderline hilarious.

When you're a woman, you have to work harder to get a laugh... I follow so many hilarious women on Twitter. It's a daily reminder that women get to be funny.

If I can surround myself with hilarious people every day, I will always want to go to work.

When we were touring with The Mighty Boosh, we went on a ghost tour of York. It was all about ghosts, and the tour guide was hilarious.

My commentary's hilarious, not witty.

I'm crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my wife is an English teacher, and she's hilarious.

That's a very nice, generic-sounding question: "When did you know you were funny?" But it pre-supposes that I think I'm really hilarious. So that's kind of a loaded question.

I can't imagine going back to long hair. Cutting it was the greatest thing I ever did

This is possibly the most shameful situation I've ever gotten myself in in my life, and I've done some pretty dumb things in my life. So to actually make a new No. 1 is spectacularly stupid.

All of 'em, any of 'em that have been in front of me over all these years.

There are so many great comedies, right now. I like how comedies are really mixing. They're not just one thing. It can be very moving and dramatic, and yet hilarious.

I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don't.

With a cheery delicacy she divided my obsessions into three categories: acceptable, unacceptable, and hilarious.

It's hilarious, because my guitar has what's known as a tremolo bar or a whammy bar. And the whammy bar is probably the most alien thing on my guitar that could possibly relate to a classical guitar.

Opening for Louis C.K. during his "Hilarious" tour was a great experience for me. He is the generation just ahead of me, because he started so young.

It's often hilarious to me that I'm writing about Tonga or some tropical place and there's a blizzard outside and the cows are on their backs with their hooves in the air.

In my mind, I'm hilarious, so I would love to do some comedy. But, I'm not exactly sure my perspective is a healthy one.

If you play it straight it's funny - the best comedy is always played straight down the middle. The adjustment is understanding from the screenplay that a moment is hilarious.

In a press conference, everyone is required to be like, "I'm just trying to do what's best for the team," but really?! It's a hilarious lie that everybody allows to be told.

My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious.

Fat jokes to me are always, always hilarious, as long as they're done towards yourself.

As I get older, I think I'm more interested in comedy that doesn't take cheap shots. But I watched some of that Justin Bieber "roast" and I thought it was hilarious.

What man art thou that, thus bescreened in night, So stumblest on my counsel?*Who are you? Why do you hide in the darkness and listen to my private thoughts?*

A peevish self-willed harlotry it is.*She’s a stubborn little brat.*

He was still thoughtful. 'Do you think any of us ever really knows anyone?' 'Philosophy, Lord Dryden? And yet it's daylight and everyone is still sober.

Fat men take a cushion with them wherever they go.

Many obese people spend a significant amount of their energy on suppressing the urge to tell some of the people who are staring at them that they do not eat as much and as frequently as they seem to.

It is usually unbearably painful to read a book by an author who knows way less than you do, unless the book is a novel.

You are more likely to find three TVs inside a randomly selected house than you are to find a single book that is or was not read to pass an exam, to please God, or to be a better cook.

One of the most common and most dangerous misbeliefs is that it is impossible for someone to be stupid just because they are a doctor or a lawyer.

Dearest Annie, Roses are red. Violets are blue. I’m using my hand But I’m thinking of you. - Ronan P.S. Just to clarify, I’m using my hand to write this note…get your mind out of the gutter.

I can't see anything" he said in a muffled voice, hand over his eyes. "I'm blind.

She's in the Catskill, " Shopie began, but Scathach reached over and pinched her hand. "

I really don’t think you should put your hand inside the manticore, dear. You don’t know where it’s been. —Enid Healy

Have they built cities on the moon?" another boy asked hopefully."We left some garbage and a flag there in the sixties, but thats about it.

Okay, well I think the programme is like being screamed at for an hour by a drunk with a strobe-light, but like I said--

How are we going to get out of here?""Oh, escape is easy once you have the right

Looking but not seeing is the hearing but not understanding of the eye.