Masturbation Quotes

Masturbation Quote of the day

The only shame in masturbation is the shame of not doing it well.

My friends keep telling me I'm doing it with Mary Palmer. That's not true - I'm too busy masturbating to meet anyone new.

In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there's no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on my bass playing abilities.

The war against illegal file-sharing is like the church's age-old war against masturbation. It's a war you just can't win.

Intercourse with a woman is sometimes a satisfactory substitute for masturbation. But it takes a lot of imagination to make it work.

My words, my writing, my actions—these have never been for myself alone, either directly or indirectly. There is no such thing as an artist who creates art only for himself. That is masturbation.

Stars today are just masturbation images.

The trouble with the Internet is that it's replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.

I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life.

Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.

Masturbation is a democratic pleasure, practiced by rich and poor, young and old, married and single.

It’s disgusting. On trains, the number of those people doing that strange masturbation-like gesture is multiplying.

I think that there's nothing wrong with masturbation. If you're not feeling good about your own sexuality and your own body, you're not going to feel good about anything else.

Masturbation is our first and natural form of sexual activity and if that's inhibited or damaged, then we suffer for the rest of our lives.

Masturbation! The amazing availability of it!

Everyone thinks their whole life should be at least as much fun as masturbation.

Self improvement is masturbation.

No matter what your race, creed or sexual preference, there is a word that people use to describe you that is very nasty. It's what we all have in common. That, and masturbation.

If masturbation is a crime then I should be on death row.

Drawing and masturbation were the first sacred experiences I remember.

I'm a promoter of masturbation. Don't sleep around...learn yourself first! Guys do it, but girls don't. They should.

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. I really hope no one misinterprets this quote as being about masturbation.

I do not need a man. I am devoted to masturbation. I think it's probably one of the most pleasurable experiences in life.

Philosophy stands in the same relation to the study of the actual world as masturbation to sexual love.

In masturbation there is nothing but loss.

Female masturbation is permissible unconditionally.

I was an altar boy, a spokesperson for the Virgin Mary, I was a choir boy but then at the age of 14 I discovered masturbation and all that went out the window.

Bouldering is like masturbation: not as good as the real thing but you don't need to worry about your protection.

Masturbation is good for the right arm.

The profuse phallic symbolism of chess provides some fantasy gratification of the homosexual wish, particularly the desire for mutual masturbation.

In the United States, the last recorded clitoridectomy for curing masturbation was performed in 1948--on a five year old girl.

Abused as we abuse it at present, dramatic art is in no sense cathartic; it is merely a form of emotional masturbation.

Masturbation is great for the right arm

Somewhere, there's someone who's masturbation ritual ends with them setting up ventriloquist dummies facing the bed. I mean, someone else.

German radicalism: freedom-masturbation.

Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. It's nothing to be particularly proud of, either.

I jerk off 'til I bust blood.

Contempt for others, like masturbation, is best as a secret pleasure.

Masturbation is the thinking man's television.

[On masturbation:] I think that it is part of human sexuality, and perhaps it should be taught.

I sometimes feel like when you're talking to boys, they just hear certain keywords… But if you had a bubble above their head, they'd be thinking about game scores, masturbation and food.

It's what I call "mental masturbation", when you engage is some pointless intellectual exercise that has no possible meaning.

Self improvement is masturbation. Now self destruction.

Instead of being a well-known painter, I became everybody's favorite dirty joke. Come to think of it, teaching masturbation skills is pretty weird.

Maybe in the 90s or possibly in the next century people will look upon the 80s as the age of masturbation, when it was taken to the limit; that might be all that's going on right now in a big way.

If you say children wouldn't know anything about masturbation on their own, you've never changed a little boy's diaper.

Twas the night before Thanksgiving. All the food's in the oven. And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'.

I even made love to myself once. Uhh, I wasn't suppose to tell you that.

Communication without a purpose is artistic masturbation.

I thought the whole masturbation thing was really odd and really weird.