My Dog Quotes

We have a really, really great dog. It doesn't bark. My dog almost smiles, which is weird. He's just a very happy dog.

If I found Yoko Ono floating in my pool, I'd punish my dog.

I got a pit bull from a shelter, so my whole life is centered on this dog, and I've been writing a lot of dog jokes. I should probably give up now, because I'm writing jokes about my dog.

He is my dog, Toto," answered Dorothy. "Is he made of tin, or stuffed?" asked the Lion. "Neither. He's a-- a-- a meat dog," said the girl.

Somewhere in [China's] soul lurks the cunning of an old dog, and it is a cunning that is strangely impressive. What a strange old soul! What a great old soul!

I love dogs because they're so adaptable.

In the eyes of my dog, I'm a man.

I have had a great misfortune; my dear old dog is dead.

I watch movies and hang with my family, go shopping, love to cuddle with my dog, Happy, & write songs with my guitar!

I have my own method [of acting]. I come from, I've interrogated people; I come from an undercover background, so it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks.

If you want to hurt me, fine. Take my books. Burn down my house. Shave my head while I am sleeping. But nobody, nobody screws with my dog.

Get a good dog. We have not picked up food in the kitchen in 15 years.

I had a weimaraner for 11 years called China, and he was a great dog, a bit mad. They're massive, weimaraners; they've got big floppy ears. They look like a pointer, but they're liver-coloured.

That's one of those questions I'm asked more often than anything else. Will my dog go to heaven? And I say well, the lion will lay down with the lamb.

I'm not really sure of anything. I have no personality or opinion on anything. I just sort of float around and lie to my dog.

I'm constantly lying to my dog. He only responds to manipulation and blackmail.

I don't smoke, I try to eat right, and I love doing yoga and going for hikes with my dog.

How do I stay healthy? I actually leave a lot of that up to my dog. He makes me get up pretty early in the morning. We go for walks together.

Screw reality. It don’t feed my dog. It don’t make my Porsche payments. It don’t get me laid. Bullshit does that…and I like it that way. (Leo)

My dog doesn't like dogs, and I kind of get where she's coming from; I'm not too keen on people.

I happened to take a photo, and there was my wife, my dog and my banjo, all in the same shot - and I thought, "Oh, that's like a family portrait right there."

I've put an umbrella in my mouth and opened it. I sat in a lemon-meringue pie. I've done terrible things to my dog with a fork.

Nothing really says ... interactivity - which was so exciting and captures the real, the Web Zeitgeist of 1995 - than 'Click here for a picture of my dog.'

I don’t have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once.

The other day, I was walking my dog around my building . . . on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

When I have time, I write other things. I'm working on a book, I paint, I sculpt, I play with my dog, I watch television - I catch up on South Park or movies or whatever I've missed, normal stuff.

My dog and two cats are such a vital part of my life. To say that I am their owner doesn't reflect at all the profound bond and responsibility that I have towards them.

My dog's a gentleman.

Every day, I walk with my dog - summer, winter (it gets -20 F in Saint Paul), rain or shine. The nicer the day, of course, the longer the walk.

Marvelous as may be the power of my dog to understand my moods, deathless as his affection and fidelity, his mental state is as unsolved a mystery to me as it was to my remotest ancestor.

My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious.

Man is too near all kinds of beasts,--a fawning dog, a roaring lion, a thieving fox, a robbing wolf, a dissembling crocodile, a treacherous decoy, and a rapacious vulture.

I have seen your despatch expressing your unwillingness to break your hold where you are. Neither am I willing. Hold on with a bull-dog gripe, and chew & choke, as much as possible.

The folkish philosophy of life must succeed in bringing about that nobler age in which men no longer are concerned with breeding dogs, horses, and cats, but in elevating man himself.

Service dogs raise their masters' sense of well-being.

A state has the right to prohibit the killing of dogs and bears whether for film or for other purposes.

I am not looking for a friend; if I want a friend I'd buy a dog.

Bullfights are hugely popular because you can sit comfortably with a hot dog and possibly watch a man die. It wont be me, but I can sit comfortably and watch it.

Intel is down but not out. We have a very nervous market and it's the dog days of summer, ... We are short-term overbought so we're giving some of it back with the excuse being Intel.

It's quite enough to show a well-beaten dog the whip.

It is better to be devoured by lions than to be eaten by dogs. Explaining why his Northwestern teams played difficult schedules.

Dogs are in on our human silliness; lions are not.

How do we know that we have a right to kill creatures that we are so little above, as dogs, for our curiosity or even for some use to us?

You may have heard that a dean is to faculty as a hydrant is to a dog.

In business everyone is out to grab, to fight, to win. Either you are the under or the over dog. It is up to you to be on top.

You can never tell about a person by guessing...that's why language was invented. Otherwise, we'd all be like dogs, sniffing each other to find out where we stood.

When women finally get liberated, they'll do the same that men do - dog eat dog - that's what our culture is.

The idiot greens the meadow with his eyes, The meadow creeps implacable and still; A dog barks, the hammock swings, he lies. One two three the cows bulge on the hill.

That's when I heard the sounds of a certified genius spinning around in circles like a dog chasing its tail.

When a dog is in your life, there is always a reason to laugh.