My Dog Quotes

A dog desires affection more than its dinner. Well - almost.

There's a saying. If you want someone to love you forever, buy a dog, feed it and keep it around.

I don't like big balls on a dog.

Politicians were like talking dogs in a circus: the fact that they existed was uncommonly interesting, but no sane person would actually believe what they said

A good catcher is the quarterback, the carburetor, the lead dog, the pulse taker, the traffic cop and sometimes a lot of unprintable things, but no team gets very far without one.

The more one gets to know of men, the more one values dogs.

In this selfish world, the one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous, is his dog.

Personally, I would not give a fig for any man's religion whose horse, cat and dog do not feel its benefits. Life in any form is our perpetual responsibility.

My idea of a perfect pet is a really, really big dog! Huge!

Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts.

Dogs, monkeys, and parrots are a thousand times less miserable than we are.

The dachshund is a perfectly engineered dog. It is precisely long enough for a single standard stroke of the back, but you aren't paying for any superfluous leg.

I love to rescue animals.... The pounds were so crowded they were putting animals down almost immediately. Seven thousand dogs were put to sleep.

You strive to have a good heart. But what is a heart? Just a chunk of flesh that a dog can eat.

My dogs are about unconditional love. It's so wonderful to walk in the door from a long day and all they want to do is be loved and to give and give.

When it comes to having a central nervous system, and the ability to feel pain, hunger, and thirst, a rat is a pig is a dog is a boy.

When you feel lousy, puppy therapy is indicated.

A rat is a pig is a dog is a boy. They're all animals.

Happiness is dog-shaped, I say.

Never stand between a dog and the hydrant.

With the exception of women, there is nothing on earth so agreeable or necessary to the comfort of man as the dog.

Say something idiotic and nobody but a dog politely wags his tail.

My dog is half pit bull, half poodle. Not much of a watchdog, but a vicious gossip!

If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

Every dog, we are told, has his day, unless there are more dogs than days.

Let the dog bark; the moon shall beam on.

Giving a politician access to your wallet is like giving a dog access to your refrigerator.

Look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a dog.

Memory is like a dog that lies down where it pleases.

You're fighting a battle of good and evil with your dog pimp! Your only weapon is the shimmy! There is power in the shimmy! Make him fear your shimmy! Now, goddamnit, show me your war shimmy!

You can take my heart, but I can't let you take my dog.

The one best place to bury a good dog is in the heart of his master.

Animals are good to think with.

I also like men who like dogs. I couldn't date a man who doesn't like my dog.

He is so shaggy. People are amazed when he gets up and they suddenly realize they have been talking to the wrong end.

Chihuahua. There's a waste of dog food. Looks like a dog that is still far away.

Dogs just need you and love, that's all.

Much has been written about the loyalty of dogs, but what I love about them isn't their devotion to me so much as their devotion to being alive.

I'm married but the special man is my dog, Henry.

I have never found in a human being loyalty that is comparable to a dog's loyalty.

The dog doesn't know the difference between Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, so I have to walk the dog early those days too.

Humans have externalized their wisdom-stored it in museums, libraries, the expertise of the learned. Dog wisdom is inside the blood and bones.

If there is no God for thee Then there is no God for me.

The dogs with the loudest bark are the ones that are most afraid.

In politics, every year in the White House is like dog years, it takes off seven years of your life.

Dog lovers hate to clean out kennels. Horse lovers like cleaning stables.

People always want to compare their dogs to having kids. That's insulting. First of all, nobody has a dog because they were too drunk to pull out.

The real platform for religion is based on the concepts of compassion, respect and consideration, not just for human beings, but for all forms of life.

What really helps motivate me to walk are my dogs, who are my best pals. They keep you honest about walking because when it's time to go, you can't disappoint those little faces.

When a dog is really comfortable, they give off a certain scent and you can smell it on their paws.