Redneck Quotes

Before, I was terrified on stage. I only play guitar during the acoustic songs. After a while, you can elicit certain responses from the crowd, like Elvis.

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and it holds the world together.

You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.

You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.

There's the old joke, "What's the difference between country and redneck? Well, that's three hundred dollars."

Elvis was, at least the times I was around him, Elvis was a practical joker. He was always, had some little mischievous something going.

You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

I've been with certain stars; some are caring and pay attention to their fans and to their fellow performers and some are too busy. Elvis never seemed too busy.

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up.

My long hair just can't cover up my redneck.

You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

You can take Elvis. You can take Marilyn Monroe. Success and fame will not be the answer if something inside of you is bothering you, if things in your mind aren't going right.

If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck

If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.

Being Elvis Presley's daughter is a whole lot of pressure. It's been a constant burden in my life.

They [Christian rednecks] were so stupid that they couldn't pour piss out of a boot even if the instructions were printed on the bottom.

I wanted to come through with my own voice and, hopefully, have it affect people. I want people to know that I'm not an Elvis impersonator.

I was out on the golf course, a guy came riding out in a golf cart and said, Did you know that Elvis died? And I just said, Well, there you go. It was like I had kinda been expecting it.

You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.

You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.

You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.

You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

The album is a definite departure. I haven't written original material before, except for one song on my first album, but Elvis and I did six songs together on this one.

You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.

Elvis' disappearing body is like a flashing event horizon at the edge of the black hole that is America today.

It’s just what they are — they’re jokes…most jokes are about Jewish people, rednecks, black folks…I can’t determine what offends another person.

You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

You might be a redneck if Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair.

You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in, with a portion of chips... you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them.

You might be a redneck if you think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.

You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.

You might be a redneck if your dogs name is Miller Light

If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.

If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out.

You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.

You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.