Snark Quotes
Snark Quote of the day
Cleverness is like rouge - liberal application makes a woman look common and desperate. Wit is knowing how to apply it.
I prefer to make up my own quotes and attribute them to very smart people, so that I can use them to win arguments
If God gave Dad Alzheimer’s, He’s got to understand when Dad forgets what church he belongs to.
My inner goddess confirms that staring at a beautiful/rich/powerful face is the basis of True Love.
I'm sorry I missed the meeting and hurt your little feely-weels okay?
Carla was wearing a No Fear sweatshirt. You are too old, Amy wanted to tell her, for legible clothing.
Hello, Mrs. Tran...I have David's homework. And if you ever want to see it again, you'll pay me the two million dollars I asked for.
You’ve missed a lot of things. But mostly I think you’ve missed several opportunities to leave. Let me assist you to the door so that you won’t miss this next one.
I understand that you don’t want to marry me, ” I said. “I mean, I don’t know why, since I’m simply delightful to be around. But to each his own taste.
He was my age and in my imagination he was a fireman, not the kind that actually fights fires but the kind who travels the country shirtless posing for calendars.
Miss Fitt, you know curiosity gets men killed."I grinned. "Then I daresay it's good I'm a woman.
I could help you, ” I said. “Counseling, drugs, a religious advisor, a girlfriend.
...It was borne in upon her audience that the outside of Jane's charming head was distinctly superior to the inside.
Are you telling me Kara Orris is afraid of rain?” Hunter’s grin twisted into a smirk as his eyes lit up, relishing his new discovery with absolute delight. “Why, that’s adorable!
John: I'm experiencing an odd sensation. I think it might be patriotism.Spitfire: Steady. Too much of that can damage your health.
The day you ever have that much control over my behavior, it will be because somebody's asking you, should she get the pine box or a plain white shroud?
Look, this is helping me out quite a bit, but could you just get to the punishment part? We're at the end of World War Two in history, and I can't wait to find out who wins.
Spike (to Giles) : Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes — 'Cuppa tea, cuppa tea... almost got shagged... cuppa tea'?
A lot of people have it in for me. It's practically a school sport.
We don't have dealings. He just stalks me. I'm popular like that.
Ah, Proph." Tom paused. "You did have a nightmare last night.""And here I thought maybe I dreamed it, " Prophet muttered sarcastically.
Whatever crimes this man had committed, they weren't as egregious as his inflated self-image.
Sorry, one night stands don't stack up as credentials for tending bar.
True cynics kill themselves. The rest are posers, trying to use clever sarcasm and snarky remarks to hide insecurity and the fear that if they put themselves out there, they will fail.
You will never find me in trouble. You will find me in the library. If you can remember where that is.
You don't have to make fun of it.""Actually I do, " I said. "I make fun of almost everything.
Ignore the reek of feces in the air, the bloodstains on the ground, and you have yourself a glorious night.
The guy had guts—I had to give him that. Later on I was hoping for a first-hand look at them.
I suppose I look acceptable, the black (haired) sheep among the Barrett blondes.
Your powers of observation are formidable, " Michael says and Darien giggles behind one perfectly manicured hand, like some sort of preppie geisha.
Sherrie would be there, and the last time I’d seen her at a social event she burst into tears when she saw me and ran out of the room. You’re upset, I’d yelled after her, meanly.
If there’s any greater exhibit of the malleability of human nature than the sight of someone standing, absently waiting for the light to change at a deserted intersection, I don’t know what it is.
The jury’s still out on your level of intellect. After all, you signed up with Evil Incorporated in the first place.