Toilet Quotes

Toilet Quote of the day

We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat!

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

The wide screen reminds me of a roll of toilet paper.

I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls. We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat. George! Only joking, Mum.

I believe your friends Misters Fred and George Weasley were responsible for trying to send you a toilet seat. No doubt they thought it would amuse you.

If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.

Bad writing is not easier than good writing. It's just as hard to make a toilet seat as it is a castle window. Only the view is different.

I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting.

The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper

I like getting toilet paper thrown at me.

It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.

You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff.

Our forests are not for toilet paper. They are worth more standing than cut. That deserves to be defended, not only by native peoples but also by environmentalists.

These were people who believed everything about the Soviet Union was perfect, but they were bringing their own toilet paper.

It's probably not love if you don't press your face to the toilet seat after they've used it to feel their warmth.

Success is like toilet paper, it only seems important when you don't have it.

The burden of keeping three people in toilet paper seemed to me rather a heavy one.

Im shy. I can go on a trip for days and not go because I wont sit on a toilet seat on a plane. Im certainly not going to go on somebodys lawn. Could you imagine, in a cocktail dress?

How can you put on a meaningful drama when every fifteen minutes proceedings are interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper?

European toilet paper is made from the same material that Americans use for roofing, which is why Europeans tend to remain standing throughout soccer matches.

My aunt in Knoxville would bring newspapers up, which we used for toilet paper. Before we used it, we'd look at the pictures.

If the entire week is a battlefield, reading the Bible is sort of like that parachute with the box of reserves that come in the middle of the war: food and water and the toothbrush and toilet paper.

Like when I'm in the bathroom looking at my toilet paper, I'm like 'Wow! That's toilet paper?' I don't know if we appreciate how much we have.

If we all had all we wanted to eat, we'd crap too much. We'd have inflation in the toilet paper industry.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.

Sensitive. That killed me. That guy Morrow was about as sensitive as a toilet seat.

Most of the time he [Marlon Brando] sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper.

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.

If you stay in a house and you go to the bathroom and there is no toilet paper, you can always slide down the banisters. Don't tell me you haven't done it.

Time kept on and on like the cheapest toilet paper.

Can't nobody [mess] with me. I'm like toilet paper, Pampers and toothpaste. I'm definitely proven to be effective.

I have always stated I designed the stadium as a toilet seat. I don't care if this is a great cultural event or a national symbol. It has nothing to do with me. It deals with the city.

You're so full of crap, you could pass for a toilet.

You're asking the government to control individual morality. This is a government that can't buy a toilet seat for under $600.

Tell me something, Adron. Sometime you’ve never shared with anyone else. Not even Thia. (Livia) I’m the one who glued Zarina to the toilet seat when she was seven. (Adron)

Life before toilet paper was not worth living.

Art is borne out of necessity. Music is a tool and men are doers. When a relationship is working, you don't need to write a song-you need to get toilet paper.

I'm like toilet paper, toothpaste and certain amenities - I'm proven to be good. I've still got 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 years left.

Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.

The only thing I use the Rolling Stone for is toilet paper when I run out.

You can't put toilet paper in the toilet [in the space ship], so there's a separate vacuum can in front of you on the wall and when you're done, you put the toilet paper in there and seal that up.

If you want to play a cool punk club, that's great - but punk clubs don't have any toilet seats. After a while, little things like that become big issues.

Maybe I've moved to the dark side, but it's clean and nice and we never run out of toilet paper.

When you go to jail, there's so much simple stuff missing. You just want some good toilet paper or a real toothbrush, a real blanket and a real bed to lay in.

When you look at the sheer volume of paper usage in the U.S. alone, it's truly frightening: paper towels, toilet paper, napkins, writing paper. Our consumption of trees is endless.

I cut coupons, love specials and believe in buying toilet paper and toothpaste in bulk. It's just who I am.

As with marathon runs and lengths of toilet paper, there had to be standards to measure up to.