Waitress Quotes

Waitress Quote of the day

Once I cried in a restaurant because the waitress told me I couldn't eat my soup with a fork, I had to use a spoon.

If home is to have a greater lure than a tavern the wife must be at least as cheerful as the waitress.

I'd played dumbasses a lot. On Mad About You, I played a very dumb waitress and they saw me.

The postman wants an autograph. The cab driver wants a picture. The waitress wants a handshake. Everyone wants a piece of you.

When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight.'

I wasn't a very good waitress, always spilling things on people and forgetting things. I once spilled ashes all over Mike Wallace's table.

I've always been melancholic. At a party, everyone would be looking at the glittering chandeliers and I'd be looking at the waitress's cracked shoes.

If the waitress has dirty ankles, the chili is good.

Flappers sounds like where waitresses go after they're too old to work at Hooters.

I'd probably be famous now if I wasn't such a good waitress.

You can't come out of drama school and think, 'It's all going to be amazing.' You have to expect to work in a bar for at least five years and be a waitress for maybe two!

I wasn't a good waitress, but I was told that I was very nice and charming, so people liked me anyway.

My mom was a waitress, and my dad was a plumber who worked for the City of San Clemente fixing mains breaks, so not too glamorous.

I have been a waitress, and I was a damn fine waitress too, let me tell you.

I'll bet I'm as old as you are." "I'm older than Sanskrit." "Well, I was waitress at the Last Supper." "I'm so old I remember when McDonald's had only sold a hundred burgers." "You win.

All I ask is that you tip your waiters and waitresses. We have to turn this situation around.

For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40 +, there is a balding, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

If a waiter or waitress tells me when gratuity is included they automatically get more gratuity. When they hide it I go with the leg kick.

Waitress!" Hedge called. "Six double espressos, and whatever these guys want. Put it on the girl's tab.

All the beautiful waitresses existed like eternal responsibilities.

When the waitress puts the dinner on the table, the old men look at the dinner. The young men look at the waitress.

I don't love comedy but I can watch someone who's kind of interesting forever. I think a waitress who's having a bad day is a lot more fun than Robin Williams doing forty minutes of material.

I own the restaurant. There are a lot of cooks, waiters and waitresses in this restaurant. They worry about their problems. I worry about all the problems.

I got lost a lot, and I was a really bad waitress... I got lost on the subway.

I had a meal in Pizza Hut and the waitress told me I didn't need to pay. So I decided to be a bit cheeky and ask for more pizza and garlic bread.

I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle."

I was very poor and I was a waitress, and it's hard to be a poor waitress in New York.

I was a single mom with two kids. What else was I going to do? It was either be in a band or be a waitress.

I mean, its hard to be an actor in the city - trying to make it as an actor - because you waitress all night, you get home really late and you're super tired and your feet hurt.

Yogi ordered a pizza. The waitress asked How many pieces do you want your pie cut? Yogi responded, Four. I don't think I could eat eight.

I was a waitress years ago when I was first trying to become an actress, waiting tables in New York City.

My first waitress job was at Johnny Rockets in New Jersey, and then I waited tables at a sports bar.

My cousin Louie, we walk into a bar, and he says, Dom, I think that waitress knows me. What do you think she knows, Louie? The fact that your belly came in four steps ahead of you?

I drove a cab. But all the girls I knew when I was young who had to work - there were rich girls - but the ones who had to work were waitresses. Because you could always get shifts in a restaurant.

We went to lunch and were talking about procrastination and the waitress overheard us and she said, 'I have a problem with procrastination, too.' I said 'Really?... Get my sandwich.'

In my heart Im just a lucky waitress.

Television, I love it, everything that happened before television lumped together, never caused folks to turn on a street to stare at me, or waitresses to ask for autographs.

The waitress had the appearance of a very old hooker who had finally found her place in life

“You don't have to be in shape to bowl. It's the only sport where there's a way to signal for a cocktail waitress.”

I've been a DJ, janitor, ditch digger, waitress, computer instructor, programmer, mechanic, web developer, clerk, manager, marketing director, tour guide and dorm manager, among other things.

I was photographing every meal I ate, every person I met, every waiter or waitress who served me, every bed I slept in, every toilet I used.

I don't care how much evidence the state presented. I've never for one moment believed he murdered that waitress.

I'm probably a lot closer than perhaps the contents of my early fiction suggest to a jaded Denny's waitress with smoker's-lung-black humor than a ghost hunter.

I got a job when I was 15 because my allowance was about $20 a week which in New York was impossible. So I used to waitress across the street from where I grew up.

If I was a waitress, I was too tired at the end of the day when I came home to try to write.

Now, as an adult, I appreciate those memories. Mom taught me the importance of compassion for your waitress, your crossing guard, your mailman.

I was a waitress. I was pretty good at it. I liked to solve those puzzles-you know, when to put the dinner order in, that sort of thing.

I wanted to be a comedian. I wanted to meet waitresses and felt that being a comedian was my best way to go about it and I was right.

Patrick Kenzie asking a bemused waitress for a newspaper in smalltown USA. 'It's like a homepage without a scroll button?'

Waitress: "And to drink?" Artemis: "Spring water. Irish, if you have it. And no ice, please. As your ice is no doubt made from tap water, which rather defeats the purpose of spring water.