Wife Quotes

One of those Christmas songs says, "You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout." How's my wife going to get along?

Joseph has lately endeavored to seduce my wife, and has found her a virtuous woman.

The wife's Mother said, ‘When you're dead, I'll dance in your grave.’ I said: ‘Good, I'm being buried at sea’.

Like so many liberal icons, Marx seldom bathed and left his wife and children in poverty. As Schlafly says, no wonder liberal women think men are pigs: Their men are pigs.

I always take my wife morning tea in my pyjamas. But is she grateful? No, she says she'd rather have it in a cup.

It does help to actually realize that however stunning the person who is, you know, fluttering eyelashes at you, she doesn't do anything to match up to your wife.

Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye.

No one knew me until I met my wife Lulu. Lulu's mother used to ask, Which one is Maurice? For six months she thought Lulu was dating Barry.

God will bless you and your marriage when you follow His blueprint.

Noah's wife, who said to Noah, Don't let the elephants watch the rabbits. Never got a dinner!

The Invisible Man, who said to his wife, I don't care if it looks silly, don't stop! Never got a dinner!

I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.

I said, "It seems like you have fond feelings toward your ex-wife. Are you two still close?" "Nah," he said casually. "She thinks I changed my name to Motherfucker."

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

Women--wives and mothers--are the same everywhere.

My wife watches me like a hawk.

I'm not even worried about settling down. I think it's way too early. I'm 25 and I'm in show business. I mean, if things go well, my wife hasn't even been born yet.

In order for romance to deepen, you must touch the heart and mind of your wife before you touch her body.

A good husband makes a good wife at any time.

A proper wife should be as obedient as a slave... The female is a female by virtue of a certain lack of qualities - a natural defectiveness.

I don't want to be a great executive without being a great mom and a great wife. I don't want to look back and say I wish I had done things differently.

A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it.

Each [of my wives] was jealous and resentful of my preoccupation with business. Yet none showed any visible aversion to sharing in the proceeds.

Surprise me! Yogi's reply when he was asked by his wife, Carmen, where he would like to be buried

I'm never going to retire and say, 'This is it. This is my last show.' I will not go on tour - I promised my wife and son no more than two weeks on the road.

I see a lot of marriages crash and burn around me and my wife. I've always been curious about how hard it is to love well and be loved.

Death isn't enough. It doesn't remove the stain. But a slap, a whiplash, square on the face, does. Because a man's face is as sacred as his mother or his wife.

White men have always controlled their wives' wages. Colored men were not able to do so until they themselves became free. Then they owned both their wives and their wages.

My former wife made me a millionaire. I used to have three million dollars.

Maybe it's shallow of me to have a wife that's so beautiful, but it makes things easier. To me she's the most beautiful woman in the world.

I'd love to do a character with a wife, a nice little house, a couple of kids, a dog, maybe a bit of singing, and no guns and no killing, but nobody offers me those kind of parts.

Pastors started killing their church members and church members killed pastors. Husbands killed wives. It's a situation no one can describe.

My wife was my greatest asset. I didn't marry her until after World War II, but she has complemented me in every job I've ever had

A child cannot be free if his/her mother is not free. A husband cannot be free if his wife is not free. The society is nothing if women are nothing.

A man's grammar, like Caesar's wife, must not only be pure, but above suspicion of impurity.

The greatest resource a worship leader has is his relationship with his wife.

My wife is the sweetest, most tolerant, most beautiful woman in the world. This is a paid political announcement.

When my wife gets mad at me, I remind myself that she is much smarter than I am and so I probably deserve it, even if I don't really understand it!

My wife called me a mule. She once said, "I didn't marry a man; I married a mule!" I kept thinking about it. It was in the back of my head. I think it makes a good title for an album.

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments.

It is a category mistake to ask, 'Who made the Unmade?' or 'Who created the Uncreated?' One may as well ask, 'Where is the bachelor's wife?'

A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.

The only solid and lasting peace between a man and his wife is, doubtless, a separation.

My wife gets pampered pretty well. She's had me trained since she was pregnant, when I started making her oatmeal with fresh berries every morning.

In a happy marriage it is the wife who provides the climate, the husband the landscape.

I caught my wife in bed with another man and I was crushed. So I said, "Get off of me, you two!"

I wished my wife to be not so much as suspected. Common traditional saying: Caesar's wife must be above suspicion.

People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.

Face the fact that there's only one sure-fire way to erase credit card debt. By picking up a big, shiny pair of scissors and cutting your wife in half.

My wife is so stupendously ugly it is easier to take her with me than to kiss her goodbye.