A consumer is not a moron. She's your wife. Don't insult her intelligence, and don't shock her.

The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife.

A good advertisement is one which sells the product without drawing attention to itself.

The pursuit of excellence is less profitable than the pursuit of bigness, but it can be more satisfying.

If you ever find a man who is better than you are - hire him. If necessary, pay him more than you pay yourself.

The more informative your advertising, the more persuasive it will be.

I did not feel 'evil' when I wrote advertisements for Puerto Rico. They helped attract industry and tourists to a country which had been living on the edge of starvation for 400 years.

Good copy can't be written with tongue in cheek, written just for a living. You've got to believe in the product.

Our business is infested with idiots who try to impress by using pretentious jargon.

If each of us hires people who are smaller than we are, we shall become a company of dwarfs. But if each of us hires people who are bigger than we are, we shall become a company of giants.

Tell the truth, but make the truth fascinating.

I’ve been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and must therefore be treated with great caution.

Life is the farce we are all forced to endure.

The measure of our intellectual capacity is the capacity to feel less and less satisfied with our answers to better and better problems.

Shared suffering: one guy messes up and everyone runs. One guy does well and everyone benefits.

After all, for mankind as a whole there are no exports. We did not start developing by obtaining foreign exchange from Mars or the moon. Mankind is a closed society.

Politicians, you know Harry Reid hates you. We get it. But when somebody from "The New York Times" or "The Washington Post" is saying this stuff, that's different, that's offensive, that's wrong.

I have three kids. I should know how to take care of them.

Seek out people to work with who are brimming with talent, energy, integrity, optimism, and generosity.