A foolproof plan for not getting a job - show up for your interview wearing flip flops.

I like pubs too, but it's hard for me to go and get proper bladdered in the way I used to. I don't want to moan about being recognised but I do get a bit of grief sometimes.

I'm more inclined to linger in the science pages of 'The Week' magazine. But my principle obsessions are still watching sitcoms and football.

I see myself as a comic but the acting helps sell tickets for gigs.

The thing I'd really like to see is the old London Bridge, with all the old buildings around it like Shakespeare's Globe. I'd like to walk along that. Don't worry, I won't get drunk and fall in.

There's a lot to do when you're a kid - spiders to catch, girls to poke in the eye - stuff to be getting on with.

I dont drive around London much. Any journey around Islington involves hundreds of speed bumps that seem to tear the bottom of your car off.

I liked the idea of all of humanity fitting inside a sugar cube because more than 99.9% of matter is space.

I'm quite a curious person. I don't mind being the one who doesn't know things, a role I often play in QI.

I'm not a great shopper but I do buy a lot of books. I'm the publishers' friend - I buy a hundred books a year and read four.

A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear.

Keep it weird. They'll get it later.

People can hurt you, but you can still love.People can betray you, but you can still trust.People can put you down, but you can still rise.People can oppose you, but you can still prevail.

This guy is such an obvious cheater that once when he had a hole in one he wrote down zero on his scorecard.

Until women can visualize the sacred female they cannot be whole and society cannot be whole.

Anybody who thinks that 'it doesn't matter who's President' has never been Drafted and sent off to fight and die in a vicious, stupid war on the other side of the world

Your heart is like glass, if it breaks, it's pretty hard to put it back together again.

It was mint and memories and the past and the future and she felt as if she’d done this before and already she longed to do it again.

Capitalism, by its nature, entails a constant process of motion, growth and progress.

As an artist, I have to be the ambassador of everything.

The way people are being displaced, who can stop the arrival of Maoism?