A game you play with your own worst enemy-yourself.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.

An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

If God wanted the woods to be quiet, He would not have given birds songs to sing.

If bread - the staff of life - feeds the body

To err is human, to accept full responsibility is to just run with it

It's always been family first for me. No matter how well my career goes, nobody here will ask anything of me. I'm just another Dunn to them.

My children teach me to slow down and enjoy life.

If I'm having a bad day in rehearsal, I'll sleep with my script.

Every Arab nation votes against us at least two thirds of the time.

I can't do anything about the thoughts that come into my head, but I can do something about the ones that stay there!.

I am not, and never have been, a man of the right. My position was on the left and is now in the centre of politics.

The audiences like to think that satire is doing something. But, in fact, it is mostly to leave themselves satisfied. Satisfied rather than angry, which is what they should be.