A good plan isn't one where someone wins, it's where nobody thinks they've lost.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Owning a book is a third of the goal. The others are actually reading it and applying it.

Water is not frightened of the ocean. Light is not frightened of the Sun.

[Christians] are commanded to warn the nations of the world that they must repent and turn to God while there is yet time.

Since humans are social animals, you’re basically only as good as your reputation.

I don't want to dress up a picture with just my face.

We are a culture of people who've bought into the idea that if we stay busy enough, the truth of our lives won't catch up with us.

Having achieved and accomplished love, then the man passes into the unknown. He has become himself, his tale is told.

Those who come forward will not be offered an automatic pass to citizenship and should be expected to pay a substantial fine or penalty to participate in the temporary program.

If thou may not continually gather thyself together, do it sometime at least once a day, morning or evening.

For me, I think that the struggle around how to deal with Islam in the United States is the defining moral struggle of this half of the new century.