A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

I must have flowers, always and always.

What the hell is instant? Nothing is instant. Instant rice takes five minutes, instant pudding in an hour.

As long as you live, keep learning how to live.

I wanted really to make it moment to moment, partly because I'm an actor and that's how I operate - actors are all about creating the moment.

I look at myself as a product of my choices, not a victim of my circumstances.

The real hope of the world lies in putting as painstaking thought into the business of mating as we do into other big businesses.

The secret of success lies never in the amount of money, but in the relation of income to outgo.

One press account said I was an overnight success. I thought that was the longest night I've ever spent.

Samsaric pleasures are like salt water, the more we indulge, the more we crave.

He caught me to him, his arms banded tight around me. His face pressed into my throat. "Where do we go from here?" I held him. "Wherever this takes us. Together.