A man he was to all the country dear, And passing rich with forty pounds a year.

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

Blame where you must, be candid where you can, And be each critic the Good-natured Man.

To make a fine gentleman, several trades are required, but chiefly a barber.

One writer, for instance, excels at a plan or a title page, another works away at the body of the book, and a third is a dab at an index.

People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves to copy.

I love everything that's old, - old friends, old times, old manners, old books, old wine.

A man who leaves home to mend himself and others is a philosopher; but he who goes from country to country, guided by the blind impulse of curiosity, is a vagabond.

Ridicule has always been the enemy of enthusiasm, and the only worthy opponent to ridicule is success.

Ceremonies are different in every country, but true politeness is everywhere the same.

Life is a journey that must be traveled no matter how bad the roads and accommodations.

Holy shit, " somebody muttered in the dark."A virgin, " sputtered another."I didn't know they still made them.""He just did.

We can only predict the future ecological changes, by emergence of the past into the present.

Genitals are a great distraction to scholarship

I won't share everything, both in my act or in interviews. Some of the people who become the most famous are the most self-revelatory, and I'm like, 'No, it's just not worth it to me.'

Life is not supposed to be easy. Stop working so hard to make it that way. Go ahead and handle it!

Even if the pace is slow in championships, you can still sprint well and still power in the last 200, which is always the main part when the race is slow.

I think when you take people who are damaged and you give them money and freedom, it can be a toxic cocktail.

Most of the people who are in elective office in Washington, D.C., they have held public office before. How's that workin' for you?

When you're being stalked by an angry mob with raspberries, the first thing to do is to release a tiger.

What a strange distance there is between ill people and well ones.