A pinch of probability is worth a pound of perhaps.

It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.

There are two kinds of light - the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.

But what is all this fear of and opposition to Oblivion? What is the matter with the soft Darkness, the Dreamless Sleep?

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.

Time is for dragonflies and angels. The former live too little and the latter live too long.

I hate women because they always know where things are.

All men should strive to learn before they die, what they are running from, and to, and why.

Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility.

Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness.

The most dangerous food is wedding cake.

Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.

A mouse who wishes to fool the cat doesn't simply scamper out of its hole whenever it feels the slightest urge.

I think I can beat Usher on the dance floor.

The same vices which are huge and insupportable in others we do not feel in ourselves.

The imagination is too often regarded merely as an indefinite, untraceable, indescribable something that does nothing but create fiction.

If I knew what the meaning of art was, I wouldn't tell you.

Adulthood has something to do with not choosing any of the pure points of view, but living about half of what you really want to live.

Today expect something good to happen to you no matter what occurred yesterday.

Man, I hate waking up with a dead hooker.

Any time the Western way of war can be unleashed on an enemy stupid enough to enter its arena, victory is assured.