A play for me never really takes on an aspect of reality until it has left the dryair of the study and begins to sniff the musty breezes of a bare stage.

All the mistakes I ever made were when I wanted to say 'No' and said 'Yes'.

The self-hatred that destroys is the waste of unfulfilled promise.

The only credential the city asked was the boldness to dream. For those who did, it unlocked its gates and its treasures, not caring who they were or where they came from.

I have had many successes and many failures in my life. My successes have always been for different reasons, but my failures have always been for the same reason: I said yes when I meant no.

You'd be surprised how many kings are only a queen with a moustache.

There's nothing the matter with Hollywood that a good earthquake couldn't cure.

One of the grave dangers inherent in the various stages of any theatrical career-whether it be budding, quiescent or diminishing-is the advice of friends.

Poor people know poor people, and rich people know rich people. It is one of the few things La Rochefoucauld did not say, but then La Rochefoucauld never lived in the Bronx.

Far more quickly than reason and logic, irony can penetrate rage and puncture self-pity.

Playwriting, like begging in India, is an honorable but humbling profession.

Fear of facing the grasp of death changes one's outlook on every little thing.

Some general advice about writing:WRITE MORE, DO OTHER STUFF LESS.

Kisses are a means to plant on another's lips a smile glossed with happiness.

The blight of futility that lies in wait for men's speeches had fallen upon our conversation and made it a thing of empty sounds.

People do peculiar things in life and they do for whatever reason but I think one of the greatest crimes in life is when you lie.

No matter how much silverware you win in your career you always want more.

My mother wanted us to understand that the tragedies of your life one day have the potential to be comic stories the next.

Not only England, but every Englishman is an island.

Time that never ends, that never passes, that remains in the present, where all of life's secrets lie.

My mom is two people to me. She's my mom number one, and then she's this lady most comedians know as being a legendary owner of a nightclub that's responsible for starting a lot of heavy careers.