A rabid sports fan is one that boos a TV set

Fishing, with me, has always been an excuse to drink in the daytime

Christmas is a holiday that persecutes the lonely, the frayed, and the rejected.

I judge how much a man cares for a woman by the space he allots her under a jointly shared umbrella.

A sports expert is the guy who writes the best alibis for being wrong

I can't remember ever staying for the end of a movie in which the actors wore togas.

A puck is a hard rubber disk that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another.

Rooting for the Yankees is like owning a yacht.

England produces the best fat actors.

Hockey would be a great game... if played in the mud.

Joe Louis is a credit to his race - the human race.

I'm ready for something private, private and real

When asked, "Why do you always wear black?", he said, "I am mourning for my life.

How grateful I am that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has from its beginnings stood strongly against racism in any of its malignant manifestations.

The first Star Wars movie had come out in 1977 and had become this huge phenomenon with all the toys and everything - it just kind of swept America.

I seriously started drinking probably when I was about twelve. Kids are doing a lot of stuff very early.

It is my belief that there are "absolutes" in our Bill of Rights, and that they were put there on purpose by men who knew what words meant and meant their prohibitions to be "absolutes."

I needed to touch her, like I needed to breathe.

And yet.. even if you had been right, it would only have been by accident. A broken clock is right two times a day.

Some truths are expressed best in the form of myth.

Only the wasteful virtues earn the sun.