A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.

Man is nothing else but what he makes of himself.

No time is better spent than that spent in the service of your fellow man.

Where unwilling dies the rose Buds the new another year.

As long as I'm reading, I'm at home.

A perfectionist is someone who finishes the backside of a drawer, which I consider completely unnecessary.

Nor can the Apostle mean that Eve only sinned; or that she only was Deceived, for if Adam sinned willfully and knowingly, he became the greater Transgressor.

Some people are so weak that whenever they see a hammer, they immediately turn into a nail!

Jews do not have to be Christians. Christianity is an offshoot of Judaism, but too utopian, too hopeful, too unrealistic a turn.

Maybe someday, if I work hard enough, entertainment will be a career for me, but right now making videos and uploading them to the Internet is just a hobby.

I took the LSAT the day 'Jersey Shore' premiered, and after that I was too busy to go to law school.