A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

If at first you don't succeed-try, try again. Don't think of it as failure. Think of it as timed-release success.

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!

Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

Do not be afraid of what should be afraid of you

Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man".

Look every creature from the window of compassion with the eyes of love!

Adversity helps a man to know his inherent great abilities.

The true nature of man left to himself without restraint is not nobility but savagery.

At any given point, the chain of a stagnant life can be completely broken, but not with the same mental attitude that placed one in it.

The unlimited mind, the diamond mind of the Buddha, is your mind, if you can get in touch with it. Stop thinking so much and tap into that psychic part of your being.

I've always had a desire to write something and capture people's imagination like Peter Pan had captured mine.

The world is now aware that the most unavoidable and most dangerous weapon that exists is the blind decisiveness of a man ready to sacrifice his life for an obscure cause.

I knew I was in the vicinity of a serious lesson, if not about how to live life, then at least how to put some poetry into your craven retreat from it.